5 definitions by A. Hacker
During an agile project there is usually a time when the consultants have gone home and it's clear that things are quite as rosey as they'd have you believe that they were to be in the agile seminar that you took. Usually around this time the daily scrum transforms in to scratus. Communication becomes more vague, engineers take a defensive posture whereby they always accomplish something that is important to the project yet the project doesn't get closer to completion. The ultimate tell tale sign of scratus is when the managment is very tense and the engineering team refers to their work by the defect number or feature number rather than the actual feature or defect in English.
Manager: What did you work on yesterday Bill?
Bill: I closed defects 1234,5432, 3212 and 3422. I also worked on feature 1.7 from the requirements.
Manager: Are you blocked?
Bill: No sir.
Manager: Did you update our Rally online agile tracking platform with your progress?
Bill <in nervous voice now>: Yes sir. I do before every scratus, er, I mean scrum.
Manager: When will 1.7 be done?!?
Bill <meekly>: Maybe next week.
Manager: Who's next? We've got a deadline people!
Bill: I closed defects 1234,5432, 3212 and 3422. I also worked on feature 1.7 from the requirements.
Manager: Are you blocked?
Bill: No sir.
Manager: Did you update our Rally online agile tracking platform with your progress?
Bill <in nervous voice now>: Yes sir. I do before every scratus, er, I mean scrum.
Manager: When will 1.7 be done?!?
Bill <meekly>: Maybe next week.
Manager: Who's next? We've got a deadline people!
by A. Hacker August 8, 2006
The maximum workable distance for a long distance relationship. It is 1000 miles as specified in the Proclaimers song I'm Gonna Be which is the maximum distance one would walk to be with their lady.
Dude 1: I've been in a relationship with this girl but she's in New York and I'm in LA, it's really hard.
Dude 2: Yeah, that's a lot more than Proclaimers limit, that relationship might not work out, I'm sorry bro.
Dude 1: wha?
Dude 2: Proclaimers limit it's how far you'd walk to fall down at her door, it's 1000 miles...
Dude 1: oh man! I wish I knew, I guess it's time to move on...
Dude 2: Yeah, that's a lot more than Proclaimers limit, that relationship might not work out, I'm sorry bro.
Dude 1: wha?
Dude 2: Proclaimers limit it's how far you'd walk to fall down at her door, it's 1000 miles...
Dude 1: oh man! I wish I knew, I guess it's time to move on...
by A. Hacker May 11, 2013
I particularly aggressive brand of cougar. A surly middle aged woman who like to hunt younger men for companionship. Velociraptors may hunt alone or they may hunt in a group. The typical cougar uses bravado to make up for ages of insecurity, she pretends to be sure of her self and hides behind the hunt. The velociraptor is much more skilled, knows the score and is capable of taking down not just cougar bait but confident young men as well.
Person 1: Why do you think A-Rod ruined his marriage to get with that nasty old Madonna?
Person 2: I don't think he had a chance once she had him in her sights, Madonna isn't a cougar, she's a full blown velociraptor. A-Rod was simply out matched.
Person 2: I don't think he had a chance once she had him in her sights, Madonna isn't a cougar, she's a full blown velociraptor. A-Rod was simply out matched.
by A. Hacker March 23, 2009
To be fired or "laid off" in an unceremonious fashion without warning and to have the company not acknowledge it is to become an "unperson"
Engineer 1: What happened to Jim and Carl? They were helping us make this deadline.
Engineer 2: Jim? Carl? Who are those cats?
Engineer 1: They both gave status at yesterday's 8:30 standing meeting, you shared an office with Jim..
Engineer 2 in a low voice: They became unpersons, they were fired. Nobody knows why.
Engineer 2: Jim? Carl? Who are those cats?
Engineer 1: They both gave status at yesterday's 8:30 standing meeting, you shared an office with Jim..
Engineer 2 in a low voice: They became unpersons, they were fired. Nobody knows why.
by A. Hacker June 28, 2006
An adjective to describe something substandard. It is derived from junior college. For example, junior college compared to a real university. It can also be used to describe poor workmanship, such as what you might get from a junior college "grad" or a vo tech "grad." Generally, being descibed as "juco" isn't a good thing.
Guy one: What the hell kind of juco welding job is this? You got a lot of extra weld all over! You're screwing up my car!
Guy two: Hey, that's a great weld, I would have got a B or even an A in my vo tech class if I submitted that.
Guy one: I thought you knew how to weld, I wanted to sell this car when I finished fixing it up. Thanks guy.
Guy two: Hey, that's a great weld, I would have got a B or even an A in my vo tech class if I submitted that.
Guy one: I thought you knew how to weld, I wanted to sell this car when I finished fixing it up. Thanks guy.
by A. Hacker May 23, 2006