18 definition by -30-

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The day Martial Law is declared, is the day you wake up and realize that your Constution/bill of Rights/Charter of Rites and Freedoms/etc. is really just about as valuable as that Kleenex you just spunked in... because rites are just privileges, and privileges can be revoked. Your government will do whatever it takes to stay in power, and they got the gunz...

Martial Law can be recognized by the increased presence of men with plexiglass shields and/or sub-machine-guns, a pale green fog that tastes, smells and feels like burning, random acts of hippy clubbing and indiscriminate shooting into crowds.

If your going to "get your loot on" its best to do it during the Preceding state of emergency, because once Martial Law is declared, the party's over. Usually once Martial Law is declared, its best to just stay home, tune into your local state-owned media outlet and do what they say. The punishment for most criminal offenses becomes summary execution, and most of the things you might do out in public become criminal offenses.
Looting = criminal offense = shot on sight
Exercising freedom of speech= criminal offense= disappeared (shot out of sight)
looking like you might be a 'rebel' = criminal offense = a. shot on sight or b. disappeared
On the street after curfew = criminal offense = shot on sight
Looking at the officer the wrong way = criminal offense = shot on sight

If you must go out, try not to wear that 'Rage Against the Machine' tee-shirt, red stars, or clenched-fist logos, as these may attract unwanted bursts of well-aimed fire in your direction.

Remember that meeting you went to back in college? Where the guy at the front was talking about "property is theft" this, and "smash the state" that? Which you attended just so you could meet that cute outspoken Alternachick from your poli-sci class? Well, I hope she put out because thats the reason you have to agents beating on you with a phone book, trying to get a confession out of you... in the washroom of a stadium-turned-detention center. Was she worth it? (tip: just confess, the electrodes are next and a tap to the back of the head hurts less).
"Rites? Didn't you hear son? Its Martial Law! Agent Jonston, hand me those electrodes will you?"
by -30- May 31, 2005

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1. An inexperienced graffiti writer.
2. Also, a poser in any one of the other elements of hip-hop.
Orion, Soap, Addenton and Shockra are Toys!
by -30- May 12, 2005

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The BEST night to have a baby in a high-school washroom stall.
"How can I enjoy the rest of Prom Night? My dress is ruined!"
by -30- May 08, 2005

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A synthetic opiate intended to replace opiate based prescriptions or street drugs, so that an individual can be slowly weaned off and avoid withdrawal symptoms.
Often used as a fix between fixes. Its not uncommon for an addict to be on methadone and still using they're drug of choice.
The doctor put me on methadone because I'm having trouble getting of my meds for my back.

I don't have any cash until my pogey comes in, so I'm going to go get my methadone drink.
by -30- May 15, 2005

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Urban altern-a-chicks and Metrosexuals don't have boyfriends, girlfriends, significant others, husbands, wives, fuck-buddies, etc. They have 'Partners'.

A 'Partner' is very similar to a boyfriend or girlfriend, but is not a boyfriend or girl friend. If you call someone's 'Partner' a 'boyfriend' or a 'girlfriend', you will be corrected ("no, Callum is my 'Partner'").

'Partners' have many of the same characteristics as boyfriends and girlfriends (functioning genitalia, heartbeats, annoying habits, feelings, etc...), but also have very distinctive behaviors and physical features:

* 'Partners' live in "spaces", not apartments, homes, houses, pads or places.

* 'Partners' sleep and fuck on futons or dirty mattresses on the floor, as opposed to beds.

* 'Partners' generally subsist on 'ethical' or sustainable diets of Organic vegetables, Free-range meat and fair-trade coffee.

* Often, a male 'partner' can be recognized by the presence of frappichino glasses, fashionably-unfashionable clothes, 'old-man' or 'quasi-military' hats, a deliberately messy hair-do odd facial hair patterns and a generally wimpish and elitist attitude. It is not uncommon for a male 'partner' to undergo sympathy cramps while the female partner is menstruating.

* Female 'partners' are often distinguished by the accumulation of hair on the legs and arm-pits, but not necessarily the genital area. The female partner usually sports boyish clothes, Retro tees, or DIY skirts and blouses made of discarded towels , curtains or tablecloths. leg warmers would not be out of place here. Hair styles can vary from one similar to the male partner's deliberate mess, to a Zelda hair-cut. Female 'Partners' usually can be found in bars, at a table with 3 or 4 guys, in addition to her 'partner' who is quietly sipping his micro-brewed bitter-nut-dark-ale while stewing in jealousy.

* A 'partner' is generally chosen on their potential to advance one's own status in a given scene. A leader of an activist group, a drummer of a post-rock band or the focus of a peer group is generally considered prime 'partner' material. Having a good 'partner' increases your ability to name-drop, facilitates ladder climbing and makes for a fashionable conversation piece.

* 'Partners' frown on dating, as it is an outdated tradition of monogamous courtship. Instead they go on "meetings" at such venues as cheap ethnic restaurants, diners, cultural festivals, downtown parks, wooded areas and their or their 'partners' "space".

* 'Partners' can be of great importance one day, and a minor annoyance to be ignored, avoided or kicked to the curb the next. This is because people in 'partnerships' generally strive to avoid any commitment or responsibility in a life devoted to the pursue of their own pleasure, and likely have other 'partners' lined up, if they're not fucking them already.

* Although the term 'partner' suggests equality in a relationship, this is not the case. The power in the relationship rests with the 'partner' that cares less. As one 'Partner' loses interest, they become harder and harder to arrange a 'meeting' with. leaving the other 'partner(s)' confused as to the state of the decaying 'partnership' leading to desperation and insecurity.

* The term 'partner' is not exclusive to those in monogamous relationships. Often, those choosing open relationships refer to each other as 'partners'. hence, it is possible for someone to have multiple 'partners' and 'partnerships'. This helps facilitate the spread of STDs amongst bohemian, activist and alternative circles.

* The term 'Partner' is not exclusive to straight relationships. In fact, the term has been borrowed (co-opted or colonized... if you will) from the L.G.B.T. community which used the term to denote a participant in a same-sex relationship. Gay people resent straight people who have bastardized and colonized the term, just as black people resent white people who have co-opted hip-hop music.
Metrosexual: "Oh, Charlie's my partner. We met at the post-rock show at the Alex P. Keaton."
Me: "Your what?"
Metrosexual: "My Partne---"
Metrosexual: "Ow! Why are you oppressing me?"
by -30- August 07, 2005

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The Asshole of Ontario. 'Sort of like Woodstock, but West of London, as opposed to East. Where the 'Wheels Inn' is.
"Your from Chatham? Now it makes sense."
by -30- May 07, 2005

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This is THE answer if someone accuses you of being high or drunk. generally used when one's eye's are a bit of a give-away, or when one is on the nods. I believe the unspoken strategy of people using this excuse is that if enough addicts us it while showing symptoms similar to drowsiness, they'll fool everyone.

Wether or not this excuse works, depends on the experience of the accuser with addicts, drunks, etc. This probably won't work with a cop. It may work with a shelter worker, depending on how naive they are. It probably will work on your parents, providing it's late, and they're chumps.
cop: "So, have you been using tonight?"
addict:"No sir, I'm just tired is all...l"
cop:"hand's behind your back."

shelter worker #1 (me): "Your fucked up go to detox. Stop nodding off in my lobby."
addict: "I'm just tired, is all..."
shelter worker #1 (me):"get up, get out! get up, get out!"

shelter worker #2: "Umm, excuse me sir, I think you might be under the influence of some sort of drug, are you 'high' sir? because if you are, i'd have to ask you to leave..."
addict: "I'm just tired, is all..."
shelter worker #2: "Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir, let's get you to bed right away... oh, you'd like to use the washroom for 20 mineuts? of course, go right ahead."
addict: "mwehh... thank yuhhhhh.. *underbreath* chump..."

parent "little johnny, are you on the 'dope' right now? you can tell me, i'm your friend..."
little addict johnny: "No! I'm just tired! Gosh, why dont you let me be!"
parent: "I'm sorry snookems."
by -30- May 15, 2005

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