Paul's definitions

macbook pro

Apple Computer's latest weapon. Features a base that's capable of causing third-degree burns.

You: Would you like to try my new MacBook Pro? Here, put it on your lap.
Victim: Hey, it's got a camera... aagh! My sperm!

by Paul June 18, 2006

Egg Beater

A person who excessively masterbates.

Shannon is such an Egg Beater. He spanks his monkey everyday in drew hall watching Tip Drill.

by paul March 14, 2004

North Canton

A Great Place to Live and Raise a Family. Or so thats what they say. I say, A Great Place to Get in a Wreck Trying to Get Out of the Post Office. North Canton is a town straight out of the 50's, primarily because it hasn't changed since the 50's, except for that it has approxiamately 4329850275827 more stoplights. Residents of Greentown think they live here, but they don't.

Greentown resident: "I live in North Canton!"
North Canton resident: "No you don't. I do. You live with cows. I have a family and we have 2.4 children and 1.8 cars, one of which was hit when I pulled out of the post office."

by Paul June 19, 2004

res rockets

Cigarettes from an Indian Reservation.

These cigarettes are made from tobacco grown by Native Americans / First Nations and sold in bags of 200 for well below the price of commercial brands.

Also spelled "rez rockets".

Screw paying $45 a carton for smokes, I'm gonna buy a bag of Res Rockets for $20.

by Paul June 12, 2005

true champion

he who is the true champion... only the true champion knows who is the true champion. Only candidates for true championship may compete for the true championship..

i.e. You are not the true champion because if you were you would not be looking up the definition.

Ian is not the true champion. Neither is Tim....

by Paul December 30, 2004

Lettuce

Nickname for money, cash.

Muthuh fuckuh boosted my lettuce at the party.

by Paul August 23, 2004

Malarious

To die laughing

That comedy was malarious

by Paul November 4, 2003