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1.
A female sexual toy cleverly disguised as a vegetable.

Most bag clerks at the grocery stores look at the women purchasing these and guess whether this chick is on a diet or if this thing is going where many men have gone before.

Trust me, when a bagger sees a 300 pound woman buying a cucumber,he knows she isnt on a diet!

He almost feels sorry for the torture the little green veggie will be suffering.
The bagger knew the cucumber was in for a bad night, so he "accidentally" left it out of the bag.
by Cheerleader Fucker August 26, 2004
1042 130
 
2.
A mess that isn't as big as a pickle.
"Oh snap, we're in a pickle."
"Naw, man. Don't sweat it, This is just a cucumber."
by Squirrel Overlord October 08, 2004
356 157
 
3.
a vegetable, one of several that make for an excellent "penis". Available in various lengths and circumferences. Some have enticing "bumpies" on them for extra stimulation. Best washed and dried before use (who knows where they've been !) Similar to zuchini, carrots, leeks.
When she has to come home alone on Saturday night, she cozies up to her vegetable bin and chooses her mate from among the cucumbers, zuchini, carrots and leeks.
by Jake February 25, 2004
260 87
 
4.
Dangerous dildo for one who is gay. Emergency rooms report numerous cases were aggresive users got carried away with the veggie, had it slipout of their hands, and turn sideways in the colon. Only a doctor could remove it.
The embarrassment of having the cucumber removed from LeRoy's ass was worse than the medical procedure it took to retrieve the lost veggie.
by Richard Black May 01, 2005
159 96
 
5.
a vegetable, green and elongated.
May I please have some cucumber on my salad?
Mmm...fresh cucumber is a great snack.
by salad face March 14, 2007
114 58
 
6.
An item commonly used by certain people for some ...entertainment ;)
Me: Hey, you have a better use for this cucumber than I'd ever have.

You: No. No. No.

Me: Yes you do.
by Banana Joe The Second September 03, 2013
13 1
 
7.
Long green vegetables that can be used in salads or as a dildo. Common among stuck-up jill-offs and crotchety old ladies.
Alex said he saw Mrs. Duboise buy the 6 longets cucumbers at the Fruit Market yesterday morning.
by RatchetBoo June 20, 2003
22 10