631 definitions by Jake

When your roommate is asleep on his top bunk, proceed to come in with your lover and have passionate, rough butt sex with her. You pull out too fast and she shoots poo all over your chest. You are so disgusted by the fact that she pooped on you that you puke all over her back. She is, in turn, disgusted at what you have just done that she turns to yell at you and returns the puking favor. Your roommate is laughing so hard on his bed that he falls off and breaks his arm. you and your lover must take him, covered in poop, vomit, and semen, to the hospital for his injury.
You walk into McDonalds and say to the counterworker, "I would like teh Joe B Special, please".
by Jake March 5, 2005
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1. To prevent a male friend or associate from getting some action.

2. Any such attempt to prevent a male friend or associate from getting some action.
1. Damn, Johnny just totally cockblocked his roommate. Ass.

2. OK, Isaac's making his move on Clarisse in the living room, and the game is on in fifteen minutes. We're going to have to attempt a cockblock.
by Jake April 13, 2003
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what that new phone you got blows anus
by Jake April 25, 2005
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very red nipples on particularly-white breasts
she could say "no" until I sucked her cranberries, then it was "yes, Yes ! YES !!!!"
by Jake March 17, 2004
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(noun) the process of placing cum into the vagina
She drops by every Saturday morning about 2 a.m. for a sperm injection from my whang
by Jake March 25, 2004
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(1) to gain access to something

(2) to have sexual relations with a female

(3) an untapped resource is a female who hasnt been with a man yet (a.k.a. a virgin) or a quiet girl with a lot of potential that not many people rate or notice
(1) We tapped the second keg of beer just before 9 pm.

(2) I tapped her on our second date.

(3) That new girl in my tutorial is an untapped resource, everyone thinks she's a nerd.....but I just know it can be tapped!
by Jake February 18, 2004
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Homework: (Noun) a punishment given to students by evil teachers after the students have already put in 7 hours of hard labor. (See evil, torture, wrong, cruel, unjust, satan, crap)
my satan teacher gave me crap
by Jake January 19, 2005
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