heptune's definitions

schnitzelmouse

(n)A fat-bodied, short-legged mouselike rodent, a vole.

My cat left a dead schnitzelmouse on our porch.

by Heptune May 14, 2005

poodle paddy

(n) A pile of dog shit. Similar to lawn sausage.

I stepped in a poodle paddy when I took that shortcut through the dog-owner's yard.

by heptune August 31, 2008

Hudson River eel

(n) a used condom, so-named because it is the only kind of fish one would see floating in this polluted river.

Several Hudson River eels littered the filthy pier.

by Heptune May 14, 2005

slime fruit

(n) The lumpy, gelatinous fruit of the noni tree. The fruit has been used traditionally to repel ants and treat eye ailments. Because of its foul smell, slimy texture and evil taste, some people think that it is good for them, and they drink its juice.

My kids used to enjoy having slime fruit fights, after which they didn't have to worry about being bitten by fire ants.

by Heptune May 18, 2005

crumbles

(n)Small, hard particles that come from blackheads and pores, extracted by firmly rubbing the face.

I saw the girl by the grill rubbing her face for crumbles, and I hoped she wasn't going to handle my burger.

by heptune August 31, 2008

weirdshitometer

(n) A measure of how peculiar something or someone is.

That guy with the split tongue is offscale on the weirdshitometer!

by Heptune May 15, 2005

mae west

(n)A parachuting malfunction more officially called a lineover, in which a line crosses over the top of the parachute, dividing the canopy into two parts. The result resembles a giant bra; hence the reference to the well-endowed late actress.

I got a mae west and had to use my reserve.

by Heptune May 14, 2005