Speedog's definitions

Alberto VO5

Noun: a brand of hair care products trademarked and patented in 1955 by The Alberto Company (now Alberto-Culver), and famously employed by such celebrities as Lucille Ball and Jacqueline Kennedy-Onassis.

In order to maintain her classic coiffure, the First Lady made extensive use of Alberto VO5.

by speedog May 28, 2010

helotize

Verb (from ancient Spartan social terrminology): To reduce a population of formerly free peoples to serfdom, usually by means of military force, invasion, occupation, or annexation under political duress.

"Although not overtly stated in public, from the beginning the Nazi policy for the Eastern Occupied Territories was to helotize all Slavic peoples who were not immediately selected for extermination."

by Speedog December 28, 2009

Devil's Ladder

Noun: a series of metal rings piercing the underside of the penis, running from just under the head down to near the junction with the scrotum; intended to heighten sensation for both partners during intercourse.

Right after Shawn got the Devil's Ladder he fucked Joyce so hard she couldn't pee without screaming for two days.

by speedog July 27, 2010

causality

Noun (physics terminology): the natural sequential relation between any cause and its subsequent effect in the known universe, in which any effect is invariably preceded by the cause of that effect, and never the reverse.

"Newton's Third Law of Motion is essentially a confirmation of the principle of causality."

by speedog April 30, 2010

hands up

The universally accepted gesture of, or order thereof, surrender between any combatants in which the surrendering party(s) hands are elevated 90 degrees vertically without weapons, in order to visually display the non-possession of any weapon, and the voluntary cessation of all hostile action on behalf of the surrendering party(s).

"When the Allied forces exited their trenches and advanced forward, the Axis soldiers came out with their hands up.)

by speedog May 2, 2010

unintentionally hilarious

Adjective: description of any expression, statement or definition which, although originally intended in earnest, results adversely in humorous disdain.

"Wendy's attempt to explain how her underwear ended up in the frat house rec room was unintentionally hilarious."

by speedog April 28, 2010

Lunarize

Verb - to entirely destroy and obliterate, especially via aerial and/or surface bombardment, a specific geographic area or zone, in such manner as that the resultant topography resembles the surface of the Earth’s moon.

“. . . subsequent to the R.A.F. operation of 25 April 1945, the Nazi enclosure on the Obersalzberg was shown to have been almost completely lunarized.”

by Speedog September 26, 2009