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1. Celebration of spring fertility (spring is only really happening around the same latitude as Southern Italy, where this holiday was technically invented, but whatever) as celebrated by the Romans. Later overlapped with the feast of St. Valentine, and was accordingly Christianized in a way that made little to no sense (assuming that St. Valentine was not the patron Saint of getting it on).

2. Some damn Hallmark holiday that was designed to make men, no matter what their situation (dating, married, single, playa, whatever) miserable.
1. Let's all celebrate the emerging sexual urges of animals in church. Thank you Valentine's Day!

2. Single men are depressed, dating men are stressed, and married men are teetering on the brink of suicide. Yup, its Valentine's Day.
by asdf.what January 28, 2004
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9
Probably the lamest holiday known to man. Just a ridiculous waste of time. I would celebrate groundhog's day way before this lame ass day. It is for wimpy puppy dog types that are about to get their lives ruined by an evil snatch.
I wish the women would shut up about valentine's day and get their asses back to work.
by running out of patience February 14, 2008
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11
the worst day of the year i mean like we really need another day of the year to make us feel bad cause were single thank you effin hallmark
person 1:ohhhh im so happy its valentines day

person 2:why this is the worst day of the year

person 1:someone doesnt have a boyfriend!
by join the teenage army March 12, 2008
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12
Commercialistic bullshit holiday invented by corporations to cash in on pussy-whipped men. Tries to create the image of love and when the day is really about money, greed and materialistic objects. It also makes single people feel miserable. Suicide rates are known to go up during this time of year.
"Hallmark and Fannie May all cash in on Valentines Day while making single people feel miserable in the process."
by DJHill February 14, 2004
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13
1: A marketing ploy designed to create the expectation between couples that they will buy useless, overpriced "gifts" for one another that will be quickly forgotten the day afterward.
2: A cruel, vicious holiday designed to mock single people and remind them of just how lonely they are.
1: My girlfriend got pissed 'cuz I didn't get her some shit for Valentine's Day.
2: Valentines Day makes me want to crawl in a hole and die.
by Gazuga April 22, 2004
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