Trumpet's ego 

Bigger than the universe...
gets all the solos
the solos fuel the ego to grow bigger and better >:D

How the Trumpet's ego works...
Ex:Trumpets are better than Clarinets
Ex:Trumpets are better than Sax
Ex:Trumpets are better than trombones
Ex:Trumpets are better than flutes
Ex:Trumpets are better than oboes
Ex:Trumpets are better than percussion...
Ex:Trumpets are better than (insert instrument here)

Trumpet's ego by Levi Strauss & CO™ December 8, 2017

ragman's trumpet

A trumpet played by a rag and bone man

He wants fucking with a ragman's trumpet

ragman's trumpet by disloyal subject February 22, 2012

Fuck me with a ragman's trumpet 

Expression of surprise, quite long but effective at getting all the surprisedness out in one breath. For 'ragman' think Steptoe/Sanford & Son. Aha.

'Well fuck me with a ragman's trumpet. There IS a Santa.'

Fuck me with a ragman's trumpet by mockschmock December 9, 2006

Gideon's Trumpet 

A euphemism for the male sexual organ. Derived from the 1974 movie "2069: A Sex Odyssey", which is the first result on the internet movie database IMDB.com when a search is performed for "Gideon's Trumpet". As a euphemism, this phrase has no connection to the book of the same name by Anthony Lewis or the movie based on the book.

She enthusiastically blew Gideon's Trumpet.

Gideon's Trumpet by JoJoeJoh March 5, 2011

Playing the angel's trumpet 

Getting high by smoking weed

-Why is John's eyes so red? He's acting weird.
-Oh, him? He's playing the angel's trumpet.

Playing the angel's trumpet by QueenSativa October 26, 2010

Devil’s Trumpet 

When your girl eats spicy food and you eat ass.

Oh, you had Thai food for dinner? Looks like I’ll be playing the devil’s trumpet tonight.

Devil’s Trumpet by Canigetanickname February 21, 2020

Angel's Trumpet 

Essentially a reverse rusty trombone, an angel's trumpet is performed by giving a blow job while inserting a thumb in the receiving party's anus.

Sarah wanted to give me a rusty trombone, but I said fuck the hand job, play the angel's trumpet baby.

Angel's Trumpet by The Receiving Party January 29, 2014