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the programmer 

The person at your place of business who subtly or not so sublty manipulated events for his own amusement. Often instigates encounters with the likes of the goat and koliyah.
Hey koliyah, why do you think I am the programmer?

Who says I think that?

Everybody, I heard you say it.

How did you hear me?
the programmer by Nottobrite September 19, 2005

The Programmer's Curse 

When learning a new language, unless your first working sample is "Hello World" you will be cursed and will struggle to use that language for anything useful.
I was learning Ruby on Rails but because I didn't start with a "Hello World" example, I've been struggling with it from Day One.

Bob: "Hey, Jim. I can't seem to understand why my Ruby on Rails project just won't work."
Jim: "Did you start with a basic "Hello World" example to show you understand the basics?"
Bob: "Heck no! Why would I waste my time."
Jim: <smh> "Well, good luck, Jim. You've cursed yourself with The Programmer's Curse.
The Programmer's Curse by h4rper August 28, 2019

Programming the ENIAC 

Used to describe a particularly daunting and tedious task, but usually one with very good outcomes. Originates as a reference to the programming of the first computer, the ENIAC (Electronic Numerical Integrator And Computer), which would take hours to program simple math functions. Programming was done with a series of switches and in binary (1s and 0s).
"Passing Ms. Smith's English class is like programming the ENIAC."

Neurological Linguistic Programmers: The First Juvenile Release 

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to perianal abscesses.
Person 2: Yes
Person 6: Neurological Linguistic Programmers: The First Juvenile Release

Theory of Programming the Laws of Physics

A theoretical framework proposing that the laws of physics are not eternal, immutable decrees but rather something akin to a program—code written into the fabric of reality that could, in principle, be read, understood, and perhaps even modified. This theory draws on analogies with computer science: the universe as a vast computational system, physical laws as its operating system, constants as parameters, particles as data structures, interactions as functions. It suggests that what we experience as "laws" might be the running of a cosmic program—and that sufficiently advanced understanding might allow us to access the source code. The theory opens possibilities that traditional physics forecloses: that laws might have been different in other cosmic epochs; that they might vary across regions of the multiverse; that they might be patchable or upgradeable; that intelligence might eventually learn to program reality itself. It also provides a framework for understanding paraphysical phenomena: if the universe is running on code, then what we call "paranormal" might be interactions with aspects of the program we don't yet understand—undocumented features, developer backdoors, or glitches in the matrix.
Example: "His theory of programming the laws of physics suggested that the constants we measure aren't fundamental—they're settings in a cosmic program, parameters that could be changed. The universe isn't a machine running on fixed laws; it's a computer running code, and we're just beginning to learn the language."

PICK UP ARTISTRY: The First Juvenile Release For Neurolinguistic Programming. 

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to perianal abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to perianal abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 3: PICK UP ARTISTRY: The First Juvenile Release For Neurolinguistic Programming.