Survival Kit 

The products included in your Tesco delivery used to protect you from Coronavirus. The contents include a six-pack of knock-off Heinz beans, a packet of rice, Carex hand sanitizer, a four-pack of jumbo toilet paper, and a second-hand Mankini. It normally only lasts about 2 weeks, and all comes up to about £39.99. Considering the rarity of these items, due to the bulk buying customers planning to self-isolate, the Survival Kit is heavily underpriced (not that it is a bad thing though).

Michael: “I’m scared, I wanna hide from Coronavirus!”

Pablo “What about your Coronavirus Survival Kit?”

Survival Kit by Flatulent_Jarvis March 16, 2020

Stoner Survival Kit 

(noun) a bag/pouch/etc. that contains lighters, grinders, rolling papers, pipes, and/or other things a stoner needs to smoke it up

"Hey dude, should we stop by the store to grab a blunt?"
"Nah man, I have one on me. You know I always carry my stoner survival kit."

Stoner Survival Kit by Mydickistherealbiglebowski March 5, 2014

White Collar Survival Kit 

Wallet, keys, mobile phone.

I had to rush it this morning, so I forgot my White Collar Survival Kit!

White Collar Survival Kit by Rigoulot May 14, 2011

Bushwackers Survival Kit 

A wallet containing a bank card, ID and a condom.

I'm gonna have to go home, I forgot my Bushwackers Survival Kit.

Bushwackers Survival Kit by whoknewyouknew January 28, 2013