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Masturbating excessively and sending inappropriate texts/ images / videos because you have to wait to be sexually gratified for a significant other to return
I am patiently waiting for you to come back from your trip.
patiently by paper hats July 7, 2019

patiently waiting

waiting quietly
im patiently waitin fer you

also a song by 50 cent
patiently waiting by m money October 8, 2003

Patient Zero 

Patient Zero is the first human infected by a new or recently discovered viral or bacterial outbreak. They usually have the most basic, least mutated form of the disease, which may either make them invaluable to medical efforts or completely useless. They can also often be used to determine where the disease came from.
Becky in Contagion was Patient Zero
Patient Zero by Snowskeeper April 3, 2013

identified patient 

Psychology term describing an individual, usually a child or teen, in a dysfunctional family who:

1) Gets scapegoated and blamed for a family's problems
2) Has emotional problems that are not a mental illness, but a normal response to the stress of dealing with an unhealthy family in denial
3) Blows the whistle on a dysfunctional family's problems

Phrase originated because family therapists recognized that the child "identified" as the patient is not necessarily the one who is sick.
1) John is dropping out of school and doing drugs and his parents want him institutionalized, but it turns out his mother is an abusive alcoholic and his father is chronically absent. John is the identified patient.

2) Becky is extremely depressed and fearful. She accuses her father, correctly, of molestation, but the parents deny it and accuse Becky of being sick for reasons that have nothing to do with them. Becky is the identified patient.
identified patient by Tigereyes August 23, 2006

The Patient 

The character that the My Chemical Romance album The Black Parade is centered around. He is battling a disease and when he dies, death comes to him in the form of a parade of people in black marching band outfits. This concept is based off of Gerard Way's belief that death comes to you in the form of your fondest memory.
The Patient sees death as a Black Parade.
The Patient by We're all dying March 9, 2009

Patient Transport 

Hospital workers who are under appreciated that transport patients through out the hospital.These people are awesome and randomly break out into song, occasionally...
5th Floor: Telecom can you page some awesome people that randomly break out into song, occasionally...?
Telecom: Oh you mean Patient Transport?
5th Floor: 10-4
Patient Transport by LJNSLM March 11, 2012