The uncanny ability of older men to lift copious amounts of lumber, heavy furniture, and beat their sons in arm wrestling.
by UIC123 April 19, 2011
An abnormal, chronic condition that utterly destroys the spirit of those unfortunate enough to be affected. Victims usually enter an initial phase of existential shock coupled with long bouts of heavy, heavy introspection. Symptoms usually include a decreased will to participate in all social activities, as well as a general lethargic and depressing outlook. This disease is highly infectious and may be transferred merely by word of mouth in fortuitous circumstances. This disease carries no race bias.
Treatment: Direct intervention by loved ones, making significant amounts of money, getting laid.
Treatment: Direct intervention by loved ones, making significant amounts of money, getting laid.
H: Sup Jones?
J: Oh, hey Haboob.
H: How's it goin?
J: Oh, dude.. I'm super stressed about all this reading I got to get done this week. Plus my arms are super sore from cleaning all those big ass boats all day. I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore(patient undergoes period of existential shock).
H: I was not expecting that kind of real shit. So... I guess that means you're not coming out tonight?
J: Nah man, I gotta get my shit together. I'll have like a beer or two... maybe. Hey, maybe you should start thinking about taking school seriously too.
H: ....
1 week later...
L: Sup Haboob?
H: Oh, hey Laz.... How's it goin?
L: Oh life's great man, I got this new job and I'm making good money. Hours are shit but its good. How's yours?
H: Aw, man. I've been studying all week and feel like shit. I feel like I'm getting too old for all this partying (patient undergoes period of existential shock). I gotta make money man, 20 is the new 55. I've been trading bitcoins all week.
L: Oh, shit. Does that mean you're not coming out tonight?
H: I'll come around, maybe have one beer.
L:....
2 weeks later....
P: Yo, Laz! Let's get hanned tonight~
L: Can't man. I'm allergic to beer.
P: Man, this dumbass nigga got the Old Man Disease.
J: Oh, hey Haboob.
H: How's it goin?
J: Oh, dude.. I'm super stressed about all this reading I got to get done this week. Plus my arms are super sore from cleaning all those big ass boats all day. I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore(patient undergoes period of existential shock).
H: I was not expecting that kind of real shit. So... I guess that means you're not coming out tonight?
J: Nah man, I gotta get my shit together. I'll have like a beer or two... maybe. Hey, maybe you should start thinking about taking school seriously too.
H: ....
1 week later...
L: Sup Haboob?
H: Oh, hey Laz.... How's it goin?
L: Oh life's great man, I got this new job and I'm making good money. Hours are shit but its good. How's yours?
H: Aw, man. I've been studying all week and feel like shit. I feel like I'm getting too old for all this partying (patient undergoes period of existential shock). I gotta make money man, 20 is the new 55. I've been trading bitcoins all week.
L: Oh, shit. Does that mean you're not coming out tonight?
H: I'll come around, maybe have one beer.
L:....
2 weeks later....
P: Yo, Laz! Let's get hanned tonight~
L: Can't man. I'm allergic to beer.
P: Man, this dumbass nigga got the Old Man Disease.
by koolgraps December 4, 2013
An elderly man that dreams of screwing women between the ages of 15-35, or women who look like they're 15-35. Often stare at their young flesh. They often try to score with them. Usually have to settle with porn or elderly women, unless they are very rich ( check sugar daddy)
Elderly man : Hey sweetie, can get me a soda pop from that cooler. These old bones can't handle such a low bend. Thanks hon....... No, that's not the one I wanted. I think you need to reach way at the bottom and get me another one. Thanks hon. You're a doll.
Girl 1: Ew. That dirty old man is staring at me.
Girl 2: Oh, I think that guy owns all of MacDonalds.
Girl 1: You know what, he looks pretty cute holding himself
on that walker like that.
Girl 1: Ew. That dirty old man is staring at me.
Girl 2: Oh, I think that guy owns all of MacDonalds.
Girl 1: You know what, he looks pretty cute holding himself
on that walker like that.
by foxmoon October 2, 2006
by OldManPenis September 25, 2014
When you develop leather-like skin caused by years of excessive tanning; looks similar to your dad's old worn leather loveseat.
"Whose that '40 something' ex-porn star/bar owner hanging out with those '20 somethings'?
"Oh, you know, that's just 'Old Man Leather'"
"Oh, you know, that's just 'Old Man Leather'"
by Shady Dip March 8, 2008
\m/ Old Man's Child \m/
by Limblessless October 5, 2008
Relating to the inexplicable dieselness of of older men. This is usually on display in the gym when the burly gentleman in his 60s walks over to the flat bench, throws three 45 lbs. plates on each side (315 lbs. to those who can't add that fast), and proceeds to bang out 5 sets of 12 reps each with no warm-up. Other examples of this phenomenon are the inability to beat an old guy (particularly a father type) in a fair type regardless of your size compared to his and the seeming ability of old ass men to pick up and carry three times their weight.
by Jitty015 July 24, 2006