landphobia

Landphobia is the bigotry and intolerance towards landownership and People of Land. People of Land (PoL) is one of the most marginalised minority groups in modern day society and is constantly subject to microaggressions (e.g. not paying rent plus tip on time); hateful bigotry (e.g. ‘being a landlord is not a rEaL jOb’); and at times even systemic discriminations such as property tax and eviction moratoriums.

Rentoid: Landlords add nothing to society and are parasites. Why am I forced to pay to live in my own house??
People of land: What is this Landphobia? I’m literally shaking right now!!

landphobia by OS69 August 29, 2021

Get merch

Flying Landshark

Similar to the Landshark, but with an airborn approach. (sufficient safety gear and adult supervision required) A woman stands pressed against a wall a few feet away from a bed with her loose (or soon to be loose) ass jutting out in a splendor of erotic courage. Next a man strategically positioned at least 5 feet from the opposite side of the bed takes off at full sprint, leaps into the air using the bed as a trampoline, puts his hands over his head as if he were a shark, and nails his woman so hard in the ass she either shits, dies or screams so loud that the neighbors think its the fourth of July.

"And heres the instant replay of Kock Inyu nailing the Flying Landshark on Cok Inmi, All three judges agree, 10 points for the flying asian sensations!!!!"

Flying Landshark by J Bornberg December 22, 2004

Get merch

The landshark

The woman braces herself facing a wall, naked, hands against the wall, legs spread, bent over so that her ass is lusciously jutting out. (hint: She might want to wear a biking helmet and some rollerblading wrist guards to avoid serious injury.) Next, the guy also naked as well as stiff cocked, walks to the opposite end of the room, places his palms together and raises them above his head, (thus imitating the dorsal fin of a shark) and begins chanting the theme to Jaws. When given some predetermined signal, the guy sprints toward the girl at full speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead square in the ass.”

My favorite part of The Landshark is hearing the iconic theme composed by John Williams. Sometimes, I like to have the other person start a few rooms away so I can hear the entire thing before engaging in mutually satisfying sexual congress followed by waffles.

The landshark by Yolo master swag October 16, 2017

Get merch

Landstown

The inner most circle of hell, where the tormented souls are trapped in a DMV, surrounded by kegs with holes in them and hot women with no holes in them for eternity. This is controlled by the devil's bitch Hilary Clinton.

"Dude I heard you got grounded?" "Ya dude, it's like I'm going to Landstown all over again."

Landstown by Captain Chris Morgan March 5, 2008

Get merch

Landshrimp

Noun.

1. Another name for an inexperienced person, a newb.

2. A person with no impressive talents, a failure.

You were kind of a landshrimp last night, learn how to shoot your vodka.

I saw some landshrimp wearing socks with his sandals. Horf.

Landshrimp by EssDizz December 18, 2009

Get merch

landshark

The woman braces herself facing a wall, naked, hands against the wall, legs spread, bent over so that her ass is lusciously jutting out. (hint: She might want to wear a biking helmet and some rollerblading wrist guards to avoid serious injury.) Next, the guy also naked as well as stiff cocked, walks to the opposite end of the room, places his palms together and raises them above his head, (thus imitating the dorsal fin of a shark) and begins chanting the theme to Jaws. When given some predetermined signal, the guy sprints toward the girl at full speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead square in the ass.

I landsharked your mom.

landshark by tilded April 17, 2003

Get merch

landsho

landphobia

Flying Landshark

The landshark

Landstown

Landshrimp

landshark