Kaiser is a german title indicating "Emperor"
A female equivalent in contrast is named 'Kaiserin' (Empress)
The Holy Roman Emperors (962–1806) proclaimed themselves Kaiser.
by Climb Razor July 2, 2010
Franz "Kaiser" Beckenbauer.
Greatest fussball-player and coach ever.
Led Germany 1974 and 1990 to the world-championship.
Look dude, there's the Kaiser.
by Fritz Schnackenpfefferhausen November 4, 2005
1) To be caught masturbating; esp. by your college roommate

2) To masturbate
I thought my roommate was out of town, but he came back in the room and totally kaisered me.

I am going to kaiser until I can’t walk!
by Duke of New Orleans March 15, 2006
Kaiser is an amazing guy! hes sweet sensitive and has an awesome sense of humor. He is very atractive and is deffinatly the guy you can count on. Kaiser is great boyfriend material and is very understanding and treats a girl like royalty! hes outgoing most of the time and easy to talk to but has a shy side that few people know about. he likes all kinds of girls, from blondes to brunets and even gingers! if you date him consider yourself super lucky! there arnt many guys out there like him!
Kaiser is so sweet!
by alkjwoeirbnjkadv August 1, 2010
To spend an entire night trying for a girl only to go back to her place and reject her advances because you'd rather get to know her better first.
Guy 1: Yo I had such a good time with this girl last night.
Guy 2: Ohh nice, so you got it in?
Guy 3: Nah man I totally Kaiser'd her. Why won't she text me back!?!
by Wifin on the phone gimme $20 November 3, 2011
To be caught masturbating.

To masturbate.

Named in honor of a certain individual at PHS, who had a hard time keeping his pants on.
I went eleven days without kaisering, and when I did, I blew the roof off.

That was a tough workout, I'm gonna kaiser as soon as I get home.

I had a ton of studying to do, and I couldn't stop myself from kaisering to relieve stress.
by Boo Radley of Penfield March 26, 2007
1. some one with a big penis that is hot
2. some one who is hung like a horse
by beast head June 16, 2008