Top definition
An extremely amazing penis which is not only long, but has girth and is pretty to look at.
"Dude, kyle has got a jesus penis!"
by kkbabi April 12, 2010
Happy St. Patties Day!
When any male has a tattoo of Jesus inscribed upon their penis in any location.

Done so that during penetration, the man can say to the woman. "Can you feel that? You have Jesus inside you."
Woman: "Oh, Jim! That feels fantastic!"
Jim: "I knew getting a Jesus Penis was a great idea. Doesn't sex always feel better when you've got Jesus inside you?"
by RaptorJesus666 December 05, 2009
Happy St. Patties Day!
a phrase yelled not spoken when taken by surprise or pissed off.
Player1: (frags opponent on COD4)"YEAAAHH"
Player2: "JESUS PENIS"
by Ollie from the Mist March 30, 2008
Happy St. Patties Day!
A term often yelled when either in a great debate, and or a pissed off mood.
Dawson: "Jesus Penis! These scrotum licking daddybag bitches keep reaming my rim in Halo!"

Shawn: "Wait what the fuck is jesus penis?"

Dawson: "Oh, you know!" (winks at Shawn)

Shawn: "Love you hubby."

Dawson: "Love you too hubster."
by Dawsy Boi September 21, 2011
Happy St. Patties Day!