Gonzalez
Gonzalez is a strong Hispanic last name, meaning "Of War"
So to hell with the haters!
- you know who this is
So to hell with the haters!
- you know who this is
Get the Gonzalez mug.
Gonzalez
Gonzalez by AvalorianHuman February 23, 2019
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Gonzalez
A Latino “man” who constantly forgets everything, his keys, glasses, etc… According to tradition he must have his room and sink dirty and smelly at least 360 days of the year. In order to finish some of the excessive meals a Gonzalez would eat he must evacuate his bowls midway through the meal to expand the capacity of his stomach. The Gonzalez creature has been known to consume over 200 pounds of raw meat in a serving. You can tell you are dealing with a Gonzalez by his distinct smell which originates mainly from the foot area. It has been attempted to eradicate this smell with ultra-strength deodorizers however all attempts have failed (see skunk). Gonzalez’s have not evolved to the point where walking on 2 feet is comfortable, the Gonzalez will frequently stumble or trip while attempting to move. A Gonzalez is able to drink an entire bottle of tequila in one night and remain sensible; however depriving a Gonzalez of even one hour of sleep can have detrimental affects to both coordination and mental capacity. A common belief of the Gonzalez is that God = 2k+1.
A Gonzalez is also handicaped when it comes to cooking meals. (re-heating would be a more appropriate term) Frequently the Gonzalez burns food while it is pre occupied with other things. This contributes to the dirty smell of his environment.
A Gonzalez is also handicaped when it comes to cooking meals. (re-heating would be a more appropriate term) Frequently the Gonzalez burns food while it is pre occupied with other things. This contributes to the dirty smell of his environment.
Person: Hey Gonzalez do you have that pen I let you borrow?
Gonzalez: Uhhmmm.... *30 min later and an upside down room* I found it!
Person: Forget something?
Gonzalez: My Key!!
Gonzalez: *knock* *knock*
Person: Gonz if that is you I am not openning the door, fuck off.
Gonzalez your shoes smell like shit!
Dude your room looks like a Gonzalez
Gonzalez you have to remember your keys more often, what is this like the 56th time you have forgotten them?
Man your shoes smell like a Gonzalez
Man that drunk hobo is walking like a Gonzalez (but smells better than a Gonzalez)
Yo my 4 year old brother gets laid more than Gonzalez
Gonzalez: Uhhmmm.... *30 min later and an upside down room* I found it!
Person: Forget something?
Gonzalez: My Key!!
Gonzalez: *knock* *knock*
Person: Gonz if that is you I am not openning the door, fuck off.
Gonzalez your shoes smell like shit!
Dude your room looks like a Gonzalez
Gonzalez you have to remember your keys more often, what is this like the 56th time you have forgotten them?
Man your shoes smell like a Gonzalez
Man that drunk hobo is walking like a Gonzalez (but smells better than a Gonzalez)
Yo my 4 year old brother gets laid more than Gonzalez
Gonzalez
A Latino “man” who constantly forgets everything, his keys, glasses, etc… According to tradition he must have his room and sink dirty and smelly at least 360 days of the year. In order to finish some of the excessive meals a Gonzalez would eat he must evacuate his bowls midway through the meal to expand the capacity of his stomach. The Gonzalez creature has been known to consume over 200 pounds of raw meat in a serving. You can tell you are dealing with a Gonzalez by his distinct smell which originates mainly from the foot area. It has been attempted to eradicate this smell with ultra-strength deodorizers however all attempts have failed (see skunk). Gonzalez’s have not evolved to the point where walking on 2 feet is comfortable, the Gonzalez will frequently stumble or trip while attempting to move. A Gonzalez is able to drink an entire bottle of tequila in one night and remain sensible; however depriving a Gonzalez of even one hour of sleep can have detrimental affects to both coordination and mental capacity. A common belief of the Gonzalez is that God = 2k+1.
A Gonzalez is also handicaped when it comes to cooking meals. (re-heating would be a more appropriate term) Frequently the Gonzalez burns food while it is pre occupied with other things. This contributes to the dirty smell of his environment.
A Gonzalez is also handicaped when it comes to cooking meals. (re-heating would be a more appropriate term) Frequently the Gonzalez burns food while it is pre occupied with other things. This contributes to the dirty smell of his environment.
Person: Hey Gonzalez do you have that pen I let you borrow?
Gonzalez: Uhhmmm.... *30 min later and an upside down room* I found it!
Person: Forget something?
Gonzalez: My Key!!
Gonzalez: *knock* *knock*
Person: Gonz if that is you I am not openning the door, fuck off.
Gonzalez your shoes smell like shit!
Dude your room looks like a Gonzalez
You're such a gonzalez! you have to remember your keys more often, what is this like the 56th time you have forgotten them?
Man your shoes smell like a Gonzalez
Man that drunk hobo is walking like a Gonzalez (but smells better than a Gonzalez)
Yo my 4 year old brother gets laid more than Gonzalez
Gonzalez: Uhhmmm.... *30 min later and an upside down room* I found it!
Person: Forget something?
Gonzalez: My Key!!
Gonzalez: *knock* *knock*
Person: Gonz if that is you I am not openning the door, fuck off.
Gonzalez your shoes smell like shit!
Dude your room looks like a Gonzalez
You're such a gonzalez! you have to remember your keys more often, what is this like the 56th time you have forgotten them?
Man your shoes smell like a Gonzalez
Man that drunk hobo is walking like a Gonzalez (but smells better than a Gonzalez)
Yo my 4 year old brother gets laid more than Gonzalez
Gonzalez
A male with this last name is very affectionate with ALL the ladies, is quite handsome, sweet, and funny, yet so humble and respectful, loves soccer with a burning passion, screams "GOOOOOOL!!!" at the top of his lungs rather often, is so Mexican he eats a shit ton of Tapatio with his tacos, is superbly intellectual/intelligent, has like 17 primos (cousins), sings corridos in the shower, wakes up to a rooster's "kikiriki" every morning, has many friends/acquaintances, and can be successful at anything he wants to.
In other words, he's just the PERFECT alpha male.
In other words, he's just the PERFECT alpha male.
Gonzalez
A man who hibernates like a bear, he well eat nonstop, sleep non stop, but if you disturb him from his slober or his meal he well never forgive you
Gonzalez by Speedwagon64 September 5, 2025