faceturbate 

The act of masturbating to pictures found on Facebook. Faceturbators search for attractive pictures of people they know, or just strangers in their network, and use them to get off.

I can't believe you faceturbate to those pictures of my sister on the beach!

faceturbate by A concerned citizen of February 16, 2007

Faceturbate 

Verb: the act of liking your own status or pictures on Face Book just to gain higher 'like' numbers, or in a sad act of self approval.

Look at him, he's faceturbating again, i think thats a bit sad.

or

She's not that popular, she just faceturbates so people think she is.

Faceturbate by Dann C July 13, 2012

Faceterbate 

verb. The act of using facebook to chronically masterbate to the pictures of the hot people of your grade. One common step is to visually undress the target.

Sean: So, Billy did u faceterbate to Meghan lately?
Billy: Yeah, like a thousand times while watching the cubs game, and i gots mad chaff burns and a sticky belly buton.

Faceterbate by Billy <3s meghan June 22, 2008

faceterbating 

Materbating while stalking someone of facebook.

Did you see Jenna's new album man? I was faceterbating to the bikini pictures and I came like three times.

faceterbating by Fancy-Panties February 18, 2009

fasturbate 

1) the act of masturbating when in a hurry

2) masturbation under time-restrictions

my parents were coming home soon so I had to fasturbate

fasturbate by Chris "KMoney" Mason December 2, 2005

factsturbate 

v: To willfully distort, ignore, or fabricate factual material in order to serve one's selfish ends, e.g. deceiving others

Trump's tendency to factsturbate constantly when speaking to the public makes those with a firm grip on reality swell with anger.

factsturbate by geblergenschmoof October 20, 2016

fatsturbate 

When a man is sufficiently obese that his penis can be engulfed in body fat, allowing him to stimulate himself by simple, repeated shifting of body position. This auto-erotic action is fatsturbating.

My obese college roommate would always fatsturbate on the couch next to me, yelling "Check it out! No hands!"

fatsturbate by Stefan Bastardo February 6, 2010