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When something malfunctions by virtue of not existing at all. Taken (but not precisely) from "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy". In the original usage, a spaceship existed for a while and then spontaneously disappeared.
Bob: Can I borrow your car?
Bill: Nope. Sorry. It's having a total existence failure.
by Al Benedict October 22, 2009
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In swimming, when one dives into the pool when starting a race and his or her goggles immediately completely fill up with water or fall off, usually ending up somewhere part way down the person's face.
Brian: "Damn, dude. What happened during that race? You're time was freaking slow."

Tom: "I experienced total gogular failure and couldn't see shit."
by UndeadMessenger March 20, 2009
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