n. People who get paid to feel you up and stick needle into your exposed flesh for a living. Though it sounds like a good deal, to be one, you have to waste about 8 years of your life in college plus god-knows how many more years in med school. Being a doctor takes a massive toll on your mental health- They are tasked with having to tell people when they have an incurable disease, tell people that they can't have babies, and don't forget the occasional Colonoscopy!
Child: "Wow! Doctors are so cool! I want to be doctor when I grow up, too!"

Mother: "ROFLMFAO!!!"
by superdawge October 2, 2009
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A med school graduate

Somehow commands a level of prestige in society beyond his means.
Person A: "I am a doctor"

by Pyro23 July 1, 2011
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Scary. Very scary. Smiles, stabs you with needles, tells you everything is fine but it's really not...
Random Person 1: Where are you going?

Random Person 2: To the Doctor's office.

random Person 1: AHHHHHH!*faints*
by BeWareOfMe March 30, 2013
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A qualified practitioner of medicine; a physician.
"If you aren't feeling better soon, we will take you to the doctor!"
by hahahahloololol April 28, 2018
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A “man” that kills your ills with pills then kills YOU with bills
“Is anyone a doctor?”
“I am!”
Ha, nerd
by Dogcrap09 February 5, 2020
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licensed drug dealer
Why get in trouble with cops and criminals when you can get your fix legally from a doctor?
by wazzlewz1 March 12, 2010
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The person that kills ills with pills, and then kill me with bills.
"Alright here's some pills to help with the infection."
"Thanks. How much?"
"Fuck. Doctors basically you kill ills with pills, and then kill me with bills?"
by Thetruthbro69 October 2, 2020
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