n. People who get paid to feel you up and stick needle into your exposed flesh for a living. Though it sounds like a good deal, to be one, you have to waste about 8 years of your life in college plus god-knows how many more years in med school. Being a doctor takes a massive toll on your mental health- They are tasked with having to tell people when they have an incurable disease, tell people that they can't have babies, and don't forget the occasional Colonoscopy!
Child: "Wow! Doctors are so cool! I want to be doctor when I grow up, too!"

Mother: "ROFLMFAO!!!"
by superdawge October 2, 2009
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A med school graduate

Somehow commands a level of prestige in society beyond his means.
Person A: "I am a doctor"

Person B: "HOLY SHIT YOU ARE AUTOMATICALLY PRESTIGIOUS. HELP US ALL!!!!"
by Pyro23 July 1, 2011
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Scary. Very scary. Smiles, stabs you with needles, tells you everything is fine but it's really not...
Random Person 1: Where are you going?

Random Person 2: To the Doctor's office.

random Person 1: AHHHHHH!*faints*
by BeWareOfMe March 30, 2013
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A qualified practitioner of medicine; a physician.
"If you aren't feeling better soon, we will take you to the doctor!"
by hahahahloololol April 28, 2018
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A “man” that kills your ills with pills then kills YOU with bills
“Is anyone a doctor?”
“I am!”
Ha, nerd
by Dogcrap09 February 5, 2020
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licensed drug dealer
Why get in trouble with cops and criminals when you can get your fix legally from a doctor?
by wazzlewz1 March 12, 2010
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The person that kills ills with pills, and then kill me with bills.
"Alright here's some pills to help with the infection."
"Thanks. How much?"
"1,000$"
"Fuck. Doctors basically you kill ills with pills, and then kill me with bills?"
"Yep,"
by Thetruthbro69 October 2, 2020
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