Not my problem. Used in a really, derogatory, off hand way. Used to show that you really don't care. Almost a "I told you so" phrase.
You better go clean that shit up, it's NMP

I tried to tell you she was a ho, NMP.

NMP, you go find the money to pay the shark
by stuntedmonk April 11, 2007
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When someone comes up with stupid arguments proofing their problem is valid.
"a problem is presented."
- What's that?
- Not My Problem. As in, I really don't care, nothing you say or do can truly hurt me. And I don't like you, I barely tolerate you.
by time is still. August 6, 2017
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Acronym for 'not my problem'. Typically used in situations where sympathy would be expected.
From the Monk T.V. episode 'Mr Monk Gets Fired'

Commissioner Brooks:
I don't care. The man is toast. He'll never work for this department, with this department or in this department again! And I'm pulling his private liscense!

Captain Stottlemeyer:
No you can't do that.

Commissioner Brooks:
It's all ready done!

Captain Stottlemeyer:
Commissioner Brooks, Police work, detection, that's all Monk knows. If you do that it will kill him.

Commissioner Brooks:
That's NMP! Not. My. Problem.
by ceruleanblue June 29, 2012
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Neo-Morality Police, the opposite of "SJWs".
A growing community of online reactionaries who dismiss any attempts to be progressive or egalitarian movement through pejorative terms.
NMP: anybody who uses the word bigot/sexist/racist must be a tumblrite/SJW
by peachesandlily June 2, 2015
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An acronym used in text messaging or social networking. It stands for not my problem.
John- "My car broke down."
Eric- "Nmp."
by nicoleeexii September 4, 2010
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Not My Problem Parenting... a style of parenting where parents utilize natural consequences for children regarding their actions. Especially useful in parenting school age children who forget their lunch, forget to wear a coat or had detention because they didn't do their homework.

A very effective parenting style that can result in children taking more ownership of their actions and develops independence and self responsibility.
Teacher to parent: "Mrs. G, your son Eli has forgotten his homework folder three weeks in a row, and now he's going to lose his recess for a week."
Parent: "Sounds good to me. NMP. I did my homework. I have a good job. I get to chit chat with my friends at work at the water cooler. Sorry Eli, next time don't forget your homework folder. Not My Problem. NMP Parenting works!"
Child: "Waaaaa... I want my Mommy to rescue me. Oh well, I hate losing my recess so you know I'm not forgetting my folder EVER again!"
by Funny Moms August 11, 2014
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