NBC Today 

1. Popular morning tv program on the NC network.
2. Medium for lower-middle-class dorks to wave stupid cardboard signs and wave like fuckwits while that fat black weatherguy ignores them politely.
3. How Satan enters the groins of children.

I can actually hear my brain cells humming the NBC Today theme music as they die.

NBC Today by resindawg June 26, 2003

NBC's Today Show 

A television news 'magazine' consisting of about five minutes of Amerocentric 'news-ish' stories and about fifty-five minutes of commercial advertisement, blatantly or obliquely passed off as news for sister/affiliated companies and conscripted glitterati.

News anchors Matt and Meredith are given scripted content about what they may say from corporate. They are allowed to discuss anything trivial as if it were news. Actual 'news', both foreign and domestic, left NBC Today Show with the removal of Jane Pauley and Bryant Gumbel. Nobody has seen a real interview on the morning 'news magazine' since that era.

It is believed that network executives were neutered or spayed by the executive branch of the US federal government between the years of 2000 and 2008, causing network news programs like NBC's Today Show to focus more on the then popular federal prime mandate: 'Buy more stuff.' NBC's Today Show translated this into 'Buy more of our stuff'.

It remains to be seen whether NBC's Today Show will regrow a pair of gonads and actually start reporting news again.
Ann Curry is the only person believed not to have thoroughly compromised her own standards in the process.

NBC's Today Show looks more and more like the Home Shopping Network. The only difference is that most people who watch it can't afford $200 for a suit jacket, even if Meredith pretends to claim it's such a 'steal'. Most of us don't generally wear more than $100 worth of cloths at a time, if we're lucky and find NBC's Today Show tremendously out of touch.

NBC's Today Show by gr33nman February 13, 2009