Goth Pansexual
Wears black like the color of their soul and collects the tears of their enemies. Is pan because gender is a far too inferior a thing to matter to the godliness that is a goth pansexual. They probably have a lot of childhood trauma so please be patient with them. If you ask them about their life story they will go on for hours and love you forever. Compliment their outfit, eyeliner, hair, etc. they will go on thinking about it for weeks because they're used to weird stares from old men in the grocery store. Fem presenting goth pansexuals will disrespectfully curse you if you feel it's ok to sexualize them for wearing black and having shoulders. If you have a goth pansexual as your partner, understand that they are like pets. Feed them and cuddle them and calm them down when they're sad. Like crows, they'll give you shiny things to show their appreciation for you. They might look scary but deep down they really just want a hug, stuffed animals, and someone to watch a mindless movie with.
"Frick bruh look at that goth pansexual coming our way." "Calm down Brad it's just my GF and she probably needs a hug cuz her brains telling her I don't love her again."
"Yeah, my partner is a goth pansexual. I am very concerned for their mental health so I make sure to text him every 20 minutes to make sure they're ok."
"I thought I would be getting cute black lipstick kiss prints on my cheek and fun trips to pride. Now I've got this crying jingly bitch hugging my leg. But goth pansexual boyfriends are worth it."
"I didn't pick up for 10 minutes and Xe thought I died. I love my goth pansexual though."
"If he does stop collecting stuffies I'm gonna have to make a whole new room for her collection. But I love them and I knew what I was getting into when they told me they were a goth pansexual."
"Bro your complaining about your ONE goth pansexual partner. Try having two. My shoulders are constantly covered in tears from them both crying on me."
"Am I a straight man? Yes. But I've got a goth pansexual girlfriend so I know a thing or two about being a good ally."
"Yeah, my partner is a goth pansexual. I am very concerned for their mental health so I make sure to text him every 20 minutes to make sure they're ok."
"I thought I would be getting cute black lipstick kiss prints on my cheek and fun trips to pride. Now I've got this crying jingly bitch hugging my leg. But goth pansexual boyfriends are worth it."
"I didn't pick up for 10 minutes and Xe thought I died. I love my goth pansexual though."
"If he does stop collecting stuffies I'm gonna have to make a whole new room for her collection. But I love them and I knew what I was getting into when they told me they were a goth pansexual."
"Bro your complaining about your ONE goth pansexual partner. Try having two. My shoulders are constantly covered in tears from them both crying on me."
"Am I a straight man? Yes. But I've got a goth pansexual girlfriend so I know a thing or two about being a good ally."
Goth Pansexual by Ihaveakitchenwarekink April 23, 2021
Urban Dictionary Merch