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Clubbing the seal 

A variation of the phrase 'breaking the seal' whereby one often has to go to the toilet frequently when drinking, once they have gone for the first time of the evening. However, this version can have a variety of misunderstandings that sound like one is about to commit/has just committed an animal rights abuse.

Used mostly in parts of Lancashire and Cumbria, and in particular Lancaster.
Where have you been?' 'I have just been clubbing the seal'
Clubbing the seal by BenS1986 July 22, 2010
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Clubbing the seal 

When you're girl tells you she has to take a dump, you follow her into the bathroom. Just as she sits down to start, you shove your dick up her ass and start having anal.
Jennifer and I spent a good 45 minutes last night clubbing the seal.

Clubbing the seal 

Verb. When a man strikes his erect penis repeatedly onto a woman's vagina, focusing his strikes on her clitoris. Also known as, "clubbing the baby seal."
Clubbing the seal should only be performed during intimate moments and with the lights on. The woman must be supine with legs fully spread and the man must be kneeling, between her legs. The man should not be too portly. The penis must be fully erect and the labia should be spread open, usually with the assistance of the woman's fingers.

clubbing the baby seal

i walked into jeffs room and he was clubbing the baby seal and i was all like thats distugusting
A toe rag was originally a foot wrapping used, since mediaeval times up until the mid-nineteenth century, to protect the foot from chafing by boots or shoes. As these were, quite literally, rags they weren’t usually washed, and so with use they became very smelly until they were thrown away. Because of the similarity in smell, toe rag also became the name applied to dried, salted cod or other things with a strong, unpleasant, fishy smell. It didn’t take that long before the name was applied to someone who was an obnoxious, unpleasant OIC.
1 “Socks! Those aren’t socks you smelly git, they’re toe rags!”
2 “What have you been cooking? Smells like toe rag!”
3 “I can smell ‘er fanny from ‘ere, proper toe rag.”
4 That Heale Malcolm is a right toe rag.
Toe Rag by AKACroatalin November 29, 2016
Word of the Day on July 24, 2026

Eternity leave 

When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.
Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!

With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.
Eternity leave by LingDanc803 February 7, 2023
Word of the Day on July 23, 2026
The hypothetical man (often a sinister character who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.
Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.
jody by Sgt Apan March 31, 2006
Word of the Day on July 22, 2026