A preserved apple which has lost the majority of its water content and thus appears wrinkled and shriveled. It was a term invented by Shakespeare, not Seth MacFuckingFarlane.
by Gliese September 13, 2010
One who amongst your circle of friends is commonly known as a lesser person, often humorously scorned in passing, yet not worthy of lengthy thought.
"Oh look everyone it's Alex Trebek. Hey Alex, ya beef witted apple john! What's the difference between you and a bird with a cold? One's a sick duck...anyways I don't remember how it ends but your mother's a whore."
by Tony John C September 26, 2007