When you're wanking using just your mental recollections and you begin asking yourself deep questions about the meaning of life, culminating in a more fulfilling view of the universe and life as you bust a nut.
by Socratesticles July 16, 2020
Get the Philosophical Wank mug.When the sudden urge to jizz is so overwhelming that you have to stop everything and have an emergency wank
Jesus Christ. I was at McDonald's drive-thru earlier when I had to abandon the car and run into the disabled toilets for an emergency wank. It was like I was possessed
by Mrrobot7891 August 7, 2020
Get the Emergency wank mug.A wank window is limited time frame in which an opportunistic married man is alone in his home and can therefore peruse 'performing art' videos on the home computer whilst digitally stimulating his phallus. Mission control usually grants wank windows when the wife has gone to Tesco with the kids to do the shopping / gone to see relatives / went out with her mates. Wank windows are known to be tenuous and unpredictable because the wife may return early and the act of self flagellation may have to be aborted.
Courier: I tried to deliver the parcel to number 8 this morning but the bloke wouldn't answer the door. I rang the bell repeatedly but he appeared to be glued to his computer in the front room, ignorant twat!
Boss: How'd he look?
Courier: Funnily enough he was sweating, red faced and seemed utterly focused elsewhere.
Boss: Son, a man's wank window is sacred. When you're married you'll understand.
Boss: How'd he look?
Courier: Funnily enough he was sweating, red faced and seemed utterly focused elsewhere.
Boss: Son, a man's wank window is sacred. When you're married you'll understand.
by TheFoolOnTheHillAnarchy October 20, 2012
Get the Wank Window mug.by el foldo December 1, 2011
Get the Status Wank mug.Grammatically correct term for mastrubation. Wank is the verb preceding crank (noun.)
A person " wanks the crank" and not vice versa.
A person " wanks the crank" and not vice versa.
Billy's grandmother nearly fainted when she saw him wank the crank to the nude pygmies in the National Geographic.
by Macsloan October 19, 2019
Get the wank the crank mug.When in a large group of people and 1/8 of them being the commander of all the penises among them this being the wank warden
by Backedpotatoenoises February 6, 2021
Get the Wank warden mug.When your merging into one lane to merge on the highway and the car behind you tries to overtake with 5 m to spare.
They are a Wank Dick.
They are a Wank Dick.
by Driving January 1, 2022
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