Matthew Higham sucks balls
by Jordan Beighton March 09, 2016
The butter dawg. (Dawg with the buttah)
Doesn’t allow water to go down his crack. Liberal democrat. No ass hole. But what he lacks in hole he makes up for in cheeks. His eyes are full of yeast that his mom Melissa used to make fresh bread. She makes so much bread she got arrested and was no longer present for daddy boot time with mr mike.
Spends all his money on ass hair growth serum to keep his little brother warm, and knit fleeces for blind kids.
Nipples that could be mistaken for large water fowl. Lost all his ribs in the Great War and does impressions of gumby at kids parties for wet cheese money.
Subconsciously gay but outwardly slay.
Doesn’t allow water to go down his crack. Liberal democrat. No ass hole. But what he lacks in hole he makes up for in cheeks. His eyes are full of yeast that his mom Melissa used to make fresh bread. She makes so much bread she got arrested and was no longer present for daddy boot time with mr mike.
Spends all his money on ass hair growth serum to keep his little brother warm, and knit fleeces for blind kids.
Nipples that could be mistaken for large water fowl. Lost all his ribs in the Great War and does impressions of gumby at kids parties for wet cheese money.
Subconsciously gay but outwardly slay.
by Grunkle sam January 15, 2023
Matthew Key is imbrued
by Dave Carrie May 27, 2022
The same concept as the "wet willy," except instead of sticking the finger in their mouth, the attacker first sticks their finger in their bum
"I was sitting in my room the other day when I thought my brother gave me a wet willy. It was only after i smelled something putrid did I realize that it was really a Muddy Matthew"
by Muddy Matthew December 23, 2015
by Book Soup February 07, 2023