Skip to main content

Primary Douchebag

Not to be confused with the Apprentice Douchebag. Just as there is always a bigger villain behind the scene so to is a bigger douchebag. Usual signs that a primary douchebag is in the area is usually the annoyed feelings you get from the crowd around you. It is always the person who makes everyone at a party feels mad as hell.
Guy 1: I get why this party sucks there's a Primary Douchebag here and its probably Patrick.
by HourglassMage May 10, 2012
mugGet the Primary Douchebag mug.

Schrodinger's douchebag

One who just doesn't get sarcasm, is unable to tell whether a statement is a joke or not.
Calcium: Are you a schrodinger's douchebag? (he's one himself)
Drift: Nah, I just don't get sarcasm that well. (isn't actually one himself)
by Driftshock April 10, 2024
mugGet the Schrodinger's douchebag mug.

schrodinger’s douchebag

Someone who says they were spreading misinformation based on if they were actually factually incorrect,
pretending as if they knew they were wrong the whole time.

Sometimes these types of people like to call people who see through the "misinformation" "nerds", as they are too egotistical to admit that they were just being a "dumbass".
"I made this, because my friend acts like this schrodinger’s douchebag"
by not lakepants February 15, 2024
mugGet the schrodinger’s douchebag mug.

douchebag cyclist

A two-wheeled traffic hazard wrapped in $400 worth of neon spandex who truly believes public roads are their personal Tour de France training ground. Usually spotted blocking the entire lane, preaching about “sharing the road” while sharing absolutely none of it.

They’ll ride three-wide through traffic, run red lights like they’re optional, and still look you dead in the eyes like you’re the problem. Owns a $6,000 carbon bike named something pretentious like AeroSoul X-9000, drinks beet juice “for performance,” and logs every ride on Strava like they’re saving humanity.

And heaven forbid you pass one. They’ll lose their Lycra-covered minds. Just ask Gary Peacock — the legendary Park City cyclist who called the cops on a kid named Pierce for daring to drive by him. This man literally opened the guy’s car door and shouted, “I have more rights than you!” while sweating righteousness onto the pavement. That’s the final evolution of the species: the Cop-Summoning Bike Paladin.

Then they gather in packs, vibrating with caffeine and moral superiority, taking up the whole road like a rolling cult of reflective tape and trauma. AND WHY ARE YOU ALL GOING 14 MPH UPHILL BUT 60 MPH DOWN? PICK A SPEED, GREG! YOU’RE NOT IN THE TOUR, YOU’RE GOING TO PANERA!
oh look at that douchebag cyclist. he called the cops on that kid for passing near him
by racoo01 October 24, 2025
mugGet the douchebag cyclist mug.

Douchebag

A dumbass who thinks they’re better then everyone else.
Mr.douchebag bragged about his new fucking PS5 that he’ll never even use!
by Sk0olbus1 June 29, 2022
mugGet the Douchebag mug.

Douchebag

A aviation teacher that looks like an Italian, that likes to kick kids in the dick, then kiss it to make it feel better.
Mr.Tomlin is a Douchebag !
by Dougie Freshh October 17, 2010
mugGet the Douchebag mug.

DoucheBag

A DoucheBag is a person who makes shit up and blames it on you.
For example "Luciano is a douchebag because he made a romour that I was a pedophile"
by G003y September 14, 2018
mugGet the DoucheBag mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email