Nothing in one hand and shit in the other

Neither of your two options are good. But one is just plain out shitty.

Jimmy: Unemployed David has a job offer for only $5hr.
Billy: Well he’s got nothing in one hand and shit in the other.

by Juice delhagen April 29, 2022

And with your ears, you do nothing

Implies that someone is a moron, not reading the room/situation, or is just plain not listening.

Worker 1: Rinses Tupperware of salmon and broccoli remnants into sink with sign that says “Out of Order, Do Not Use”
Worker 2: And with your ears, you do nothing.

by F.Puff February 14, 2024

National Nothing Day

Today is the day you do nothing at all. And I mean nothing. Say nothing, do nothing, think nothing, look at nothing (except if it’s your crush, than that’s an exception) and just stand in your house all day.

“Hey Sarah, do you want to hang out?”

“…”

“Oh yeahhhh it’s National Nothing Day. I forgot.”

by if you’re reading this, smile! October 08, 2021

nothing forums

the BEST DAMN FORUM EVER.

Oh look here is a brilliant post on Nothing forums!

by SomeOne August 27, 2003

nothing fails like failure

a phrase meaning if one fails at one time, one may fail at other times, too.

He is a complete flop. He failed in his exam. He was snubbed by the company when he sought a job there. He even failed to win the heart of his girlfried as she jilted him. Nothing fails like failure, isn't it?

by uttam maharjan May 13, 2011

nothings going on

white people sitting around a table drinking (natty ice) wondering what's going on later,but they do not achieve going out, therefor nothing is going on

I just posted at my spot with a blunt and a brew, nothings going on.

by gypsy nig November 13, 2010

nothing important

When you were probably doing something important but you don’t want someone to know what it was

Person 1: What were you doing at jimmys house yesterday

Person 2: nothing important

by Iuseshampoo3timesayear January 09, 2025