Hot wipe

The act of sitting on the toilet and wiping one’s ass while still urinating. Usually done under duress to save time.

My side piece’s husband came home while I was dropping a deuce so I hot wiped and crawled out the window.

by MarcusDavis June 16, 2020

Fuck wipe

A used sanitary towel, not to be confused with Dracula’s teabag.

Hey Janelle? You got any fuck wipes? I’ve only got Dracula’s teabags and my cunt is sore from fucking all of the rugby team last night.

by Gloucester Cunt July 3, 2020

Wipe you off

To kick someone’s ass!

I’m glad you got out of there OK that guy was about to wipe you off!

by Knasty July 24, 2020

Wiping the crayon

When taking a shit, and it feels like the turd is stuck in your ass, but you no longer fee you can poop anymore. You try to wipe, but no matter how much there is fresh shit on the toilet paper, as if you are wiping your butt with a crayon sticking out that keeps writing on the tp (see also: Crayon Dump)

“Sorry I’m taking so long! I am trying to finish up but I’m wiping the crayon here.”

by Suburban Urbanite August 30, 2020

Ass wipe

an ass wipe is when you take toilet paper and put it up ur asshole

Wow noah is an ass wipe

by Oh yheah baby October 6, 2020

Perpetual Wipe

A perpetual wipe is after you drop a steamin load in the John, and, unbeknownst to you, the wiping process will seemingly never end. An unspeakable amount of toilet paper is used, along with several flushes along the way, to avoid clogging of any sort.

Jim: Hey José! where have you been? I have been waiting for at least 30 minutes!

José: Sorry, I was just dropping a shit, and then I realized I was stuck in a perpetual wipe

by Dick Sanders696969 October 14, 2012

Wipe to Confirm

The act of wiping your butt a last time to confirm that your hole is clean and completely rid of crap. Used to reaffirm the suspicion that you've finished wiping when your previous fold of toilet paper is stainless.

Derived from the phrase, "Swipe to Confirm"

John: Man, my ass is itchy...
Dale: You sure you wiped properly, bro?
John: Nah I was in a rush man, didn't have time to check
Dale: Dayum! That's nasty! I always check properly before I leave... Wipe to Confirm, Wipe to Confirm, man

by John Dale August 15, 2012