The Skull Merchant Treatment

The catastrophic art of obliterating something so thoroughly-so viciously-that not even the memory of it’s former shape survives

“Y’all see what they did to concord”
“Yeah that game straight got The Skull Merchant Treatment”

by Calcium Stool June 7, 2025

Public order merchant

A person who uses the public order act as a threat to report you even to the police even though you've done nothing wrong.

For example a passerby thinks you swore so they threaten to call the police on you the passerby would be a public order merchant.

by BOB G 69 April 4, 2025

Tap in merchant

A "tap in merchant" is a football(soccer) player who scores a large number of goals by getting into easy-to-reach positions to score a "tap-in," which is a goal scored with minimal effort from close range and also lacks other skills, such as dribbling, playmaking, or a good first touch, relying only on being in the right place to score

Cristiano Ronaldo only scores tap ins and penalties he’s a tap in merchant

by David_5 September 21, 2025

if-else merchant

A joking or mildly insulting way to describe a programmer who relies heavily on long chains of if / else statements instead of using better programming structures.

This codebase was clearly written by an if-else merchant — it’s just nested conditionals all the way down.

by ŠibucaNiggi November 5, 2025

Gold Mine Merchant

A person who loves gold diggers.

Gold mine merchant driving a nice car picking up gold diggers.

by Gochyooh November 6, 2025