ukranian purple tortoise

a sexual act involving a midget, Halloween decorations, baby oil, and a large sponge

Man, I would give that chick a "ukranian purple tortoise" any day, but i can't because her boobs are the same size.

by spoon on my nips March 9, 2009

oily tortoise

The fully erect and lubed up genitalia of a male over the age of 60.

Gavin: "Margret you ready, I've already got an Oily Tortoise"

by TwittyTwot February 10, 2017

mad tortoise

Someone vehemently opposed to Cape Independence. Crazy, brainwashed and slow to the party.

Damn he really hates Cape Independence, shame, he's such a mad tortoise.

by bobby_the_builder July 30, 2021

the tortoise and the hare

an absolute toe-gripping fist-clenching song by stray kids

oh mate i love that skz song 'the tortoise and the hare'

i know right!!! seungmin is my bias but minho bias wrecks me so much in that.

by lucayyyy November 27, 2022

the Toasty Tortoise

Where you put a girl head-first into a sleeping bag and then fuck her in the ass.

I used to hate camping, until I gave Rachael the Toasty Tortoise at the lake last weekend.

by ThaneOfCawdor June 28, 2009

painful tortoise

when a male or female eats nails, then poops out a spiky turd causing massive pain in the sphinctor area.

" dude, after i was in home depot i had a painful tortoise"

by darksentinal4 April 10, 2010

Flapping tortoise

As the male is about to unload his Sanjay semen pull out and he put his beef whistle near the women nose and release the Jesus juice into her nose so the baby batter comes out the mouth of the women thus creating the flapping tortoise

jesus juice

flapping tortoise flapping tortoise

by The sex guru September 6, 2013