Alonsoc

busted on nut ahh haircut male with bushy eyebrows and has no rizz and gets friend zoned

You are such an Alonsoc

by dihlover December 4, 2025

Alonso-Schumacher Theory

The Alonso-Schumacher Theory is the theory that if a person, often in a formal or casual competition, has something or someone they truly care about, they are, on average, less likely to take risks even if might really benefit them.

Based on a quote attributed to Formula One driver Fernando Alonso that talked about his fellow competitor Michael Schumacher at the 2005 Japanese Grand Prix ("I knew he'd brake, he has a wife and two kids at home"), the theory is named after them.

"Y'know, Rhys's lap times could really be improved by half a second... it's like he's unwilling to go 100%."
"It's probably because he just got engaged, he can't leave his future wife."
"Ah, the Alonso-Schumacher theory in action, never gets old"

by TheManFromOsaka January 12, 2026

Slackers Anonymous

a group of people who instead of participating in the game, sit on the bench and remain there for the most part of the game until all of the good players are tired.

see: benchwarmers

Now that the seniors graduated, the Slackers Anonymous may die away if more people don't start slacking!

by ;alksjdfasd June 3, 2009

band anon

A more 'band orientated' group that if you call them banons flip a lid. They say band anons were before everyone joined

I'm a band anon not a banon.

by Why not banon? December 29, 2013

UK Anon

UK Anon, aka The Autist, is defined as a British Tumblr user who obsessively sends anonymous hatemail to Slavs, especially Serbs, & ppl who interact with them; typically ordering them no matter where they live to "get out of UK" & that Slavs are "primitive, violent, non-white & racist mass-migrating slave-laboring mail order brides & poor cheap trash"

skrotchevo: UK Anon jealous cus our cheap fake adidas is so glam.
c9h13nczstyj: Cyka mad cus straight UK men rather fuck Slavic men than her.

by gudroslav April 2, 2017

ronald alonso

dates every 7th grader in hialeah

hey you know ronald alonso
yea didn’t he date gaby and other 7th graders

by clarissa garcia March 1, 2019

alternative anonymous meetings

Refers to the more light-hearted/trivial-affliction-related (i.e., non-substance-abuse or other serious-addiction-type condition) gatherings of sufferers where everyone shares life-stories and fellowship, and tries to assist each other in reducing/alleviating said unfortunate conditions/infirmities. Examples would include Belchers Anonymous (at all the other meetings listed here, they serve you tasty carbonated drinks, but at this meeting, you only get non-fizzy libation so that you won't start burping!), Bellyachers Anonymous, Colliders Anonymous (for folks who often clumsily blunder into objects/people), Foot-steppers Anonymous (again, this would be for those of you who don't adequately watch where you're walking, and so you accidentally tread on others' toes a lot), Groaners Anonymous (they seat you in chairs with heating-pads and offer you pain-relievers), Grumblers Anonymous, Stumblers Anonymous, Whiners Anonymous, Yawners Anonymous (at all the other meetings they let you sit on comfy upholstered chairs, but here they make you sit on hard wooden benches so that you don't get too relaxed and then start sleepily displaying your tonsils), etc.

One amusing fact about alternative anonymous meetings is that quite a number of any particular meeting's attendees may also suffer from a lot of the maladies and shortcomings addressed in other anonymous meetings, as well (i.e., achy people who copiously moan and groan also tend to complain a lot and mindlessly bumble into and/or step on the feet of unsuspecting souls unfortunate enough to happen to be in their paths), and so you tend to see a lot of familiar faces at many of the various meetings.

by QuacksO July 12, 2019