"Sperm-troeteldier" (singular) or "Sperm-troeteldiere"(plural) is an Afrikaans - a language spoken in South Africa - collective noun and neologism, that directly translates to "sperm pet/s" in English. It refers to annoying infants/toddlers/children/teenagers, as the concept or idea itself, is derivative of the well-known fact that humanity is the only mammal species in the history of existence that keep their sperms as pets. This quaint little Afrikaans neologism is specifically designated for individuals who really don't like kids, and a very polite (albeit somewhat sarcastically offensive) way to describe those annoying little "knater monsters" (crotch goblins), of your friends and immediate family. This silly little neologism has maximum effect when used in close proximity to a Karen. So, if you don't like kids; this one's for you!
"Jirre, ek moet alweer vandag na my suster se fokken sperm-troeteldiere gaan kyk!"
(Jesus, today I have to go and babysit my sister's fucking sperm pets again!)
"Susan! Kom haal jou sperm-troeteldier, hy het sopas op my nuwe fokken skoene gekots..."
(Susan! Come and fetch your sperm pet, he puked on my new fucking shoes...)
Persoon 1: "Fok, ek haat kinders!"
(Person 1: "Fuck I hate children!"
Persoon 2: "Jy bedoel seker sperm-troeteldiere?!"
(Person 2: "You probably mean sperm pets?!")
(Jesus, today I have to go and babysit my sister's fucking sperm pets again!)
"Susan! Kom haal jou sperm-troeteldier, hy het sopas op my nuwe fokken skoene gekots..."
(Susan! Come and fetch your sperm pet, he puked on my new fucking shoes...)
Persoon 1: "Fok, ek haat kinders!"
(Person 1: "Fuck I hate children!"
Persoon 2: "Jy bedoel seker sperm-troeteldiere?!"
(Person 2: "You probably mean sperm pets?!")
by thefriendlysatanist March 20, 2023
Get the Sperm-troeteldiermug. by kubik2233 March 21, 2017
Get the Spermmug. The act of a man blowing his load, like that of a sperm whale blowing through its blow hole, into a man or woman's nostril whilst they snort it back, like snorting a fat line or rail.
J asked L if she remembered the favor she owed him. She said, "yes, I told you it could be anything, you name it." He said, "what about The Sperm Rail?" In which she replied, "I remember you explaining this to me, the answer is yes, we have to try it at least once." J replied, "this is why your the best woman I could ever have."
by jasonjjung76 October 27, 2022
Get the The Sperm Railmug. a decadent Detroit dish composed of Joe's Pizza,and Frita's Batidos drizzled with the finest, freshly milked LeSperm
by farter_jerkoff123 February 15, 2025
Get the sperm goulashmug. "hello there! how do you identity yourself? please?"
"well you see, i enjoy being know as a 'plastic sperm machine!"
"oh wow, thats honest! bye!"
"well you see, i enjoy being know as a 'plastic sperm machine!"
"oh wow, thats honest! bye!"
by hairy poo bum willy heas March 27, 2021
Get the plastic sperm machinemug. dude jake oh my fucking god, chris just sent us a DAILY sperm huddle at 9:45 and OF COURSE, Athena, our DBA, can't make it because she'll be in sprint planning and the daily standup for her dope ass project the SLT won't let us work on. sure wish she would Stand Up and show off those knockers so i can spurt my scrum all over her tickets as agile as possible
by Senor Snuffleupagus September 6, 2024
Get the sperm huddlemug. Cassie: "Hey, did you hear that Juliet is out for the rest of the season, probably some of next season?"
Pam: "What happened?"
Cassie: "Sperm injury...the baby is due in May."
Pam: "Good for her, but she would have been out just six months with a knee injury."
Pam: "What happened?"
Cassie: "Sperm injury...the baby is due in May."
Pam: "Good for her, but she would have been out just six months with a knee injury."
by Rising Star June 26, 2009
Get the sperm injurymug.