The Homosexual Squat

Sitting/squatting with your legs together, arms at your sides, back slightly arched but otherwise good posture. It's a compact pose.

"Oh no, Mikey's doing the homosexual squat again."

"Fellas, is it gay to sit?"
"Only if you're doing the homosexual squat like Nicole over there."

by nic.mp3 March 20, 2024

swoop up and squat down

Not to be confused with the grim "legalese" term for the infamous auto-insurance-fraud procedure, this phrase refers to a totally-positive-and-pleasant action that you employ while interacting with small children. It begins when an eager innocent-minded pint-size comes racing towards you at full speed with a big grin and his arms held out; you therefore hastily reach down and swoop up said hurtling youngster in your arms while simultaneously "doing a quick one-eighty pirouette" to rapidly swing him around with you, as well, so that he doesn't lose much of his accumulated momentum. You then swiftly squat down again and deposit him back on his feet so that he can continue running as if nothing had stopped him or even slowed him down much.

About da only time dat you would not perform a "swoop up and squat down" is if da child either appears to be upset and thus needs comforting, or desires a quickie-cuddle ("To win in life's race, children need plenty of lap time"), in which case you should instead simply sit down and cradle said closeness-craving youngster on yer knee. Be sure to keep in mind, however, dat you may need to spend at least a few minutes at dis endeavor, even if da child merely wants a few seconds of "lovies", since any other observing youngsters in da general vicinity may notice said affectionate clasping and decide dat dey would like a little snuggle-time from you, as well. It's just like if a hot chick is allowing a mushy-hearted fellow to massage her pretty feet, and one or more other nice guys happen by and observe da fun activity; it may cause said girl-loving dudes to experience a sudden misty-eyed craving for cute toes, as well, and so said damsel may therefore be obliged to remain seated there for some time while all of da guys "take turns wif her tootsies", eventually leaving her feet totally "burnished and polished" from having all da callouses rubbed off from her slender soles.

by QuacksO June 8, 2019

Pilgrim Squatting

Using the bathroom in an old fashioned manner, specifically without a cellphone, tablet, or other electronic device as a means of entertainment.

"My phone and tablet are both out of batteries, and my gameboy is out of batteries. Time to do some pilgrim squatting."

by I Disch Splitfire July 27, 2016

jumby half-squat

a young white Labrador retriever.

I just bought a new jumby half-squat.

by hdawg028 January 4, 2010

Doodle-squat

Doodle-squat is a term for aimlessly drawing or scribbling, often done during boring meetings or classes. It's like turning a piece of paper into a canvas for your wandering mind, producing whimsical or nonsensical sketches.

Usage Example 1: "While the professor droned on about quantum physics, Maria found herself in the world of doodle-squat, creating a menagerie of fantastical creatures."

Usage Example 2: "The corporate meeting was so tedious that the entire team resorted to doodle-squat to pass the time."

by dgassadf October 13, 2023

squat cobbler

aka

Hoboken Squat Cobbler
Full Moon Moon Pie
Boston Cream Splat
Simple Simon, the Ass Man
Dutch Apple Ass

When a man sits in pie and wiggles around. Often involves a costume.

A weird fetish Saul Goodman tells the Albuquerque police about in Better Call Saul S2:E2 "Cobbler".

A: Have you seen the tape, where Playuh is dooin the squat cobbler on that banana cream pie?
B: Wasn't that a crybaby squat? I mean, he cried like a baby, didn't he?
A: How would I know?

by pondababa September 2, 2016

piddly squat

The act of sitting or squatting in a puddle to piddle (pee)

The kid indiscretely sat in a sunny puddle, on the hot, wet pool deck, for a piddly squat.

by Freyjawired May 18, 2023