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Ryan the Mercenary

The living, breathing, definition of disappointment. There are no words to describe the reign of tyranny imposed by the redundant and incessant amount of sheer luck this freak of nature possesses. He's horrible. I hate him.
- CT
by Ryan the Mercenary February 8, 2021
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Back Door Mercado

When you connect enough restaurant straws to boof yourself!
When Frank couldn’t find anyone boof him at after hours, he had to resort to the back door Mercado to get the job done.
by TrashmanB September 4, 2023
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fat boy merc-ed

To eat in a manner that could be considered an act of War.
I fat boy merc-ed a taco bell quesadilla in a way that could be considered a war crime in 37 countries.
by Coyote Havoc July 26, 2024
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Beat a BLU Mercenary Day

This is a National Holiday on every June 23, where any Mercenary working for the Builders League United (BLU, a subsidiary of TF Industries) must succumb to a beating from anyone of any kind (Humans, Raccoons, Wizards, Books, Flying Eyeballs, etc.) Oh, and also they CANNOT fight back!
RED Merc: Hey pal! Guess what day it is!
BLU Merc: Uhm... What?!
RED Merc: It's Beat a BLU Mercenary Day, Chucklenuts!

*A long beating of the BLU Merc begins*
by thatsanicdude December 9, 2023
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A Saige Mercer (Abscess)...

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: A Saige Mercer (Abscess)...
by Abreathofaversaillian January 24, 2025
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When terrorist ignore the Geneva Conventions and use radiological torture to illegally interrogate merged interrogatories (merged questions).
Terrorist Dinese: (Simultaneously)“Where are you from?”
Terrorist Micro-Micro: (Simultaneously) “Where did you rape your wife?”
Terrorist Split-Hoof: (Simultaneously) “Where did you molest that little girl?”
Terrorist Mayonaise: (Simultaneously) “Where did you celebrate your last wedding anniversary?”

Survivor: “California!” “Stop, torturing me with radiation torture merged interrogations!”

Terrorist Dinese: “We have it here… that you’re from Chicago, how often do you lie about where you’re from?”
Survivor: “Stop, torturing me with illegal radiological torture merged interrogations.”

Terrorist Micro-Micro: “How often do you rape your wife, do you know that ‘No means no, it’s nonconsensual,’ who else have you raped?”

Survivor: “What,” I didn’t rape anyone. You’re the ones that confessed to gang-raping.”

Terrorist Split-Hoof: “Where did you live when you did that and were you ever caught?”
Survivor: “What do you mean? Caught for what?”

Terrorist Mayonnaise: “How often do you under appreciate you wife and not take her anywhere?”
Survivor: “…? What?”
Terrorist Micro-Micro: “Yeah why do you hurt her, don’t you appreciate your wife?”
by AmberChoseThose March 25, 2025
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