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Jared

Pussy or vagina. Someone who's not about that in life.
That guy is being a real Jared.

Grow up, don't be a Jared.
by Sally0311 September 22, 2023
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Jared's Ears

Most ticklish ginormous, and gargantious motherfuckers on this planet, in the solar system, in our galaxy, in our milkyway, and especially, on this side of the Mississippi. These existing figures that we call ears are the biggest most pergananant beings on the face of the same planet i breathe on
Man I got a real Jared's Ears on my balls
by Christophlak March 30, 2024
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Jared

Jared is always the name of a doomsday cult leader. Jared is, contrary to most cult leaders, a snivelling goblin man, who has somehow amassed a large following. He is usually accompanied by 2-3 bodyguards carrying weapons of some kind - in some cases, Jared will needlessly kill one of the bodyguards for some fucking reason.

In terms of appearance, Jareds often lack shirts (though they occasionally wear jackets), and have either scars or tattoos. They are rarely overly muscular, often having pathetic arms.
Fucking Jared.
"It is I, Jared, the exalted leader of the Order of The Sun."
"..."
"Fucking Jared."
by piss boy jr February 19, 2022
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Jared

Everyone likes jArEd, jAreD is so facking cooll, not gay at all
by Blox Crunch July 21, 2020
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Jared

Jared is a tanned sexy radgie man who loves cocaine so much it’s sometimes all he thinks about , his penis is the fattest and biggest in all the land but sometimes seems to be a problem when it comes to small girls … he always loves to shuffle and do stupid things that he doesn’t think about
Fuck sake what is jared doing ….”
by Sexy brunette girl November 23, 2021
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Jared

Absolute MOG (Man of God), absolute stud, Jared
Jared, what a MOG
by bubbachub297 April 27, 2023
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Jared

a dick who makes you do everything and is socially a 13 year old in a skinny asshole body
You finally broke up with Jared!
by yeudeudkdksksksk December 5, 2019
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