passive wank

A passive wank or passivewank (verb) is the action of masturbating whilst also partaking in a specifically intellectual activity, so much so that the act of masturbating becomes an afterthought

"Matt! Why are you passive wanking?! We're trying to do surgery here!"

by spoons2424 January 12, 2017

Face Wank

When in the act of face book raping somebody you realise you are logged in to your own account and have actually insulted yourself on your own wall.

OMG I just tried to Frape john but inatead told the world I like to lick dogs scrotum I just face wank ed

by Hinge 81 January 16, 2011

Brutal wank

When one masturbates in a violent manor causing pain and perhaps blood in the genital area

Hey Davey your mums so hot i had a brutal wank of my 12 inch dong , it was only 3 inchs after such a hardcore session

by you are not a jedi yet September 8, 2006

Spin wank

The act of male masturbation known as wanking, but with a crowd pleasing climax. The wankee takes centre stage in a circle of wankers and tugs hard on his genitals until they near climax. At this point the wankee then starts to spin creating a spunk loaded version of russian roulette as their sticky load will soon be spurting on a random circle wanker. This recipient of the man-cream soaking then has to take their place in the centre of the circle.
This takes place until at least one person collapses due to fatigue or the police are called.
There are no winners. Just wankers.

Mother: Frank, why is your t-shirt all stained?
Frank: Coz I was with the guys spin wanking all day!
Mother: What's a spin wank?
Frank: (Starts tugging and spinning) Ahhhh take that you hot bitch!

by Digitalnonsense November 10, 2006

Wank Attack

The sudden panic experienced when masterbating and suddenly you hear footsteps nearby or a door opening, or some other indication that you aren't alone. Usually preceded by immediate zipping, minimising, muting and concealing of tissues.

Dude, I had a total wank attack yesterday, I coulda sworn I heard someone coming up the stairs but it was just tiddles, stupid cat.

by Crazy Tosh May 13, 2010

utter wank

Of Questionable Quality.

"Man, the PS3 is utter wank!"

by Dam Helder November 3, 2007

Advantage Wank

When your parents are out, you put on Heavy Metal really loud and run around the house headbanging, screaming and wanking all at the same time.

Tip: Make sure your parents ARE actually out at the time.

Hizumi: "Last time I had an advantage wank was in November

It was awesome

I did it in all different places in the house, and had several thousand orgasms. The next door neighbours raised their eyebrows a bit, but oh well."

Me: "What music did you use?"

Hizumi: "Arch Enemy, D'espairsRay, Dir en grey..." (Basically hardcore metal)

by Disabled Complex January 13, 2008