topman wanker

A male individual who purchases the majority of his clothes from topman. These people are usually twats who go to gay ass clubs afterschool.

luqman: whos that mysteriously sexy man
glen: that's chris, hes a topman wanker!
luqman: oh

by sickgarms123 September 10, 2009

bloody wanker

a british person who WANKS (jerks off, gets off on him/herslef, etc.) repeatedly in the course of one day....especially Zandy

The british counselor at my camp was a blopdy wanker....but not as much as Zandy is

by Da Brow February 6, 2004

Wanker Muffin

Wanker Muffin:--- A derogatory term used to define A nympho and chronic masturbator whom you are playfully joking with. Wanker being the derogatory term, and muffin being the cute addon for which to minimalize the offense of the term.

(while talking to his friend Kayla..) I don't wanna go out with you, you little Wanker Muffin.

by Ryan Kyger October 6, 2006

airport wanker

An airport wanker will drag around his/her over-sized wheely bag in complete disregard for others even if they are ascending an escalator (you wouldn't see them going up a flight of stairs). Without looking up from their latest iPhone 6, they mope around the terminal appearing to have some sort of place they need to get to in a hurry i.e. A Starbucks skinny late. At security they wait until one of the staff asks them whether or not they've got any toiletries, laptops, or tablets when finally they start rummaging through their excessive bags to get them. "Have you got a belt?"...."Oh yes I do". Eventually, when they've got through security, they get so carried away with browsing in Ralph Lauren perfume shops that they end up late for their flight, holding up everyone else once again. If they make it to the plane they then have to manipulate their hand luggage into the overhead lockers and end up requiring cabin crew assistance. There's always that one unlucky passenger who has to be seated next to them and hear the never-ending tapping on their stupid iPad as they play 'Candy Crush'. You'll know when you see an airport wanker as you'll find yourself thinking: 'what fucked-up psycho God would create these people.'

"OMG did you see that airport wanker. He spent two hours in the Hugo Boss shop drinking a skinny latte with his wheely bag blocking everything."

by Wolverhampton rules May 11, 2015

gym wanker

a) A person who makes loud sounds in the gym it is almost animalistically homosexual

b) A person who goes to the gym often and believes he is socially superior to others when he is pompous

Mr Gibbons is such a gym wanker

by Fuh-Keface69 December 1, 2011

secret wanker

1. A person who was born in America but attempts to blend into another country's society by adopting their customs and accent in speech.

2. One who masturbates in private.

Joe: So did ya know that Jack's a secret wanker?

Stephanie: Look, what a person does in his own home is no business of mine.

by ppomg April 4, 2009

Potfaced Wanker

Someone who does the same thing over and over again, even though you and everyone else around you absolutely hates it.

David is a potfaced wanker, who wouldn’t be able to do anything even if it was handed to him

by GuyFawkes’Child July 14, 2019