A Jared is someone who is both athletic and a bit of a geek. He gets his girlfriend pregnant by Junior year in High school. He'll leave his ex for a bigger titty bitch.
"Jared, we're through!"
by C0nman February 22, 2019

by romanojare January 12, 2025

When the woman shoves a Subway sandwich up your ass while giving you a blowjob. This occurs only when you yell "EAT FRESH"
by Carl, god of all that is holy February 28, 2018

Jared’s girlfriend is a fucking weirdo. She looks like shrek or something and absolutely nobody likes them. She smells really bad and everyone talks about it behind her back. Jared feels bad but he kind of likes it
by J123345 March 4, 2025

A simple man resembling a cave man. He enjoys making others salty while he himself is the saltiest of them all, hailing from Salt Lake City. He does not understand adult jokes and goes into extreme shock when he sees a curse word. Jareds can often be found being nursed by wild Conners, who then proceed to eat them.
by BlackPoker June 8, 2018

a misogynistic douchebag who doesn't know how to take a hint, but when he does he gets pissed off at you. he also has terrible road rage, and can't complete simple tasks over and over without getting irritated i.e. has zero patience. the kind of guy who will take you on a date as more than friends when it actually is just a friend date and will ruin your favorite music with memories of how he let his attraction to you get in the way of allowing you to have a good time.
by mikayla29102 May 5, 2019
