Morning Joke

A morning TV host who makes bizarre and false political statements.

Gawaad, is that Morning Jokes new conspiracy theory?

by I, Wreckerrr March 05, 2021

Morning Wood

When you wake up and you have a giant boner or an erection for more fair and fancy terms

Today i woke up for my morning date... but then i got morning wood...
I hope it goes away quickly before i meet here!

by SushiTrash July 07, 2018

Morning Bruises

Bruises you wake up with on your legs from walking into things drunk the night before.

*Guy 1* Man my legs hurt for some reason.
*guy 2* Oh you have Morning Bruises

by MAXXX13 October 28, 2007

morning cap

Time declared by individual of latest time in the morning they will stay up studying.

With the test in two days, I declared the morning cap around 4 am. I ended up calling it around 2.

by mwallace2202 April 29, 2015

Goo Morning

Jiz on a chick's face while she's sleeping. When she wakes up, yell "GOO MORNING!!"

This morning I woke my girlfriend up by jizzing on her face and yelling "GOO MORNING!!!"

by Respectlmno34 April 08, 2011

Morning Bognor

A morning bognor is a cocktail to be enjoyed with breakfast:

It consists of the following:
- Jagermeister
- Vodka
- Vanilla Ice Cream
- Tabasco Sauce
- Red Bull.

Can also be enjoyed as an evening cocktail but is then known as a Bognor Regis.

Must always be served with a small umbrella.

I believe I will enjoy a Morning Bognor with this mornings cereal.

by drunkendisco October 28, 2009

Morning dump

Taking a shit before leaving home in the morning to go anywhere is the best thing one can do for oneself and a courtesy to others. You have your private time to make shit noises and stink up the bathroom without subjecting others in public. Once this morning ritual is done one can go on with their day in confidence.

I destroyed the bathroom when I took my morning dump!

by cpetkunas May 26, 2019