When your parents explain to you what cancer is

We all remember that day when we learned what cancer was, but my parents in particular did excruciatingly well telling me that half of my mom's side of the family had cancer and that they were going to eventually die. In fact, I think she first told us(me and my brother), at the ripe age of 4 and 2, that our grandma had stage 3 breast cancer and was going to die. She didn't even tell us what cancer was, for fuck's sake. And the consequence of that was me going on for another 8 years thinking cancer was instant death and that different parts of your body could get it.... Like, what the fuck? And then turns out my Grandpa had prostate cancer, so that was fun, but not as lethal. Another one of my great-uncles had ball cancer AND lung cancer. I can only pray that I don't share any of their fates, but I think one of the reasons she escaped it was because she went to med school. Definitely not me, so I can only hope.

Mother: Son, your grandma is going to die.
Son, crying: What?! Why??
Mother, in a perfectly calm face like this happens to her all the time: Cancer.

Son, noticing her lack of caring: Fuck you. Goodnight forever.
results of when your parents explain to you what cancer is

by PORGSSSS October 17, 2023

ben shapiro guy from fairly odd parents

The Ben Shapiro guy from fairly odd parents is the pixie Sanderson from fairly odd parents and he looks like Ben Shapiro

Omg it's Ben Shapiro guy from fairly odd parents
Omg Ben Shapiro man from the animated show fairly odd parents

by Ben Shapiro real no cap September 27, 2021

National parents-apologize-for-trauma-they-put-their-kids-through day

Remember that time your mom called you fat? Or that time your dad said you’re worthless? Its time for them to apologize! Only on December 31st!

“Mom, it’s National parents-apologize-for-trauma-they-put-their-kids-through day, you know what that means? You’re a horrible mother that doesn’t care about their child’s feelings!”

by Brown brown September 5, 2022

Your non-binary parental guardian has a fursuit fetish.

The more sophisticated “Ur mom gay”. Used to destroy anyone giving you shit.

Alex: “Yeah! Well! Ur mom gay!”

Me: “Your non-binary parental guardian has a fursuit fetish.”
Alex: *Literally fucking explodes”

by Neubekk May 12, 2018

Parents

People who think bullying is ok as long as it's done by them. If you're a parent reading this, you're probably about to write your own definition about how "you're doing it for our own good" or that "you are trying to help save our asses" Don't waste your time. Everyone can see through your bullshit. You are just trying to justify that our suffering is a good thing. I myself have asian parents and for some reason, a lot of other parents seem to like asian parents because they get shit done and raise smart, disciplined kids. No bitch. Discipline does not mean passively accepting someone mentally and sometimes even physically abusing you. I've been told in the past that the only reason I am smart and talented at everything is because my parents pressured me to be that way. I can't remember the last time my parents have ever done or taught anything useful for me besides going to work and serving me. When they try, it's often overused, recycled garbage that I could've figured out myself. I think the main reason people like asian parents is because of the way they present themselves. They are seen as badasses who get whatever they want whenever they want. In other words, they're assholes who can get away with it.

All these cocksuckers from other cultures want to suck up to these asian parent assholes so they don't have to take the responsibility of being a good parent. By the way asian kids are not smarter than anyone else. That stereotype is bullshit. They are just more likely to become doctors. Asian parents also have a tendency to act like they are more logical and scientific than anyone else on the planet even though they don't know shit about anything. I blame the whole "logical nerd who doesn't care about feelings" cliché on them. The worst thing you can do is try to please people with this kind of condescending attitude. I think asian parents and anyone who tries to act like them deserve to be abused by their boss.Asian dad: Son, did you do your homework?

Me: *frowns and walks away
Asian mom: Hey. Why is he ignoring you. Answer him.
Asian dad: No, that's okay. I don't care about him. As long as he is doing his work I'm fine. I aM sCiEnCe MaN. I dOn'T cArE aBoUt FeElInGs. oooohhhhhhh. *fart

by pooperfart November 28, 2021

Carnival parenting

A style of parenting most often engaged in by the noncustodial parent of minor children whereby the child/children are lavished with gifts, activities and a blind eye to misbehavior.

My ex-husband did his typical carnival parenting when he took the kids to the mall for a shopping spree when they had homework that needed to be done.

by JLZ-WRD October 28, 2021

Panda Parents

The exact opposite of Tiger parents or Tiger Mom/Dad. They are lazy and don't care much for what there kids do.

Dude his/her parents are total panda parents.

by slide street January 26, 2016