1 a : One who regularly inserts a douchebag probe in his anal canal for pleasure
2 a : One who regularly inserts a douchebag probe in his anal canal for pleasure... and fills it with PEROXIDE... a solution whose WARNING label states, FOR EXTERNAL USE ONLY
3 a : British : a rude awakening
2 a : One who regularly inserts a douchebag probe in his anal canal for pleasure... and fills it with PEROXIDE... a solution whose WARNING label states, FOR EXTERNAL USE ONLY
3 a : British : a rude awakening
A brilliant NYC HS teacher inserted a long douchebag probe into his anal canal, then filled it with PEROXIDE, yes, a solution whose WARNING label states, DANGER, FOR EXTERNAL USE ONLY.
TRUE STORY: A NYC High School BIOLOGY teacher, carefully (obviously without much thought)-(because he regularly performs idiotic acts - and we must point out that "only" if necessary, he will think about them after the action has taken place) at any rate, this "brilliant" HS teacher inserted a long douchebag probe into his anal canal, then filled it with "PEROXIDE"... yes, a solution whose WARNING label states, "DANGER, FOR EXTERNAL USE ONLY"... to cleans it out well, (can we say EXTREEMLY & moronically well)... so bloody well, that the walls of his intestines fried & before he can realize what an idiotic action he just inflicted upon his own self, he began to excrete blood & vomit out of his ass, for a good week. What some people do for prostate stimulation is quite disturbing... WAS THIS IDOIT BORN THIS WAY, OR DID HE LEARN HOW TO BE SO FREAKING DUMB?
TRUE STORY: A NYC High School BIOLOGY teacher, carefully (obviously without much thought)-(because he regularly performs idiotic acts - and we must point out that "only" if necessary, he will think about them after the action has taken place) at any rate, this "brilliant" HS teacher inserted a long douchebag probe into his anal canal, then filled it with "PEROXIDE"... yes, a solution whose WARNING label states, "DANGER, FOR EXTERNAL USE ONLY"... to cleans it out well, (can we say EXTREEMLY & moronically well)... so bloody well, that the walls of his intestines fried & before he can realize what an idiotic action he just inflicted upon his own self, he began to excrete blood & vomit out of his ass, for a good week. What some people do for prostate stimulation is quite disturbing... WAS THIS IDOIT BORN THIS WAY, OR DID HE LEARN HOW TO BE SO FREAKING DUMB?
by Elliot Sphinxtr January 06, 2006
A kid who decides to open an insurance agency and can't tell his head from his ass. Meanwhile, making boat loads of money can't afford to do anything with his hair and looks like a total DOUCHEBAG!
Hey, look at that douchebag in the Jaguar. He can afford that car and not do something with that hair!
by Humerous July 02, 2009
by Manny Festo May 26, 2008
That guy seen in almost every movie which includes some form of corporate company; that one well-dressed and successful office douchebag who is on top of the food chain.
Some you may have seen:
- Bill Lumbergh (Gary Cole), "Office Space"
- Luis Litt (Rick Hoffman), "Suits"
- Howard Hamlin (Patrick Fabian), "Better Call Saul"
- Therman (Zach Galifianakis), "Dinner for Schmucks"
- Donnie Azoff (Jonah Hill), "The Wolf of Wall Street"
Some you may have seen:
- Bill Lumbergh (Gary Cole), "Office Space"
- Luis Litt (Rick Hoffman), "Suits"
- Howard Hamlin (Patrick Fabian), "Better Call Saul"
- Therman (Zach Galifianakis), "Dinner for Schmucks"
- Donnie Azoff (Jonah Hill), "The Wolf of Wall Street"
Jim - "Hey, Sean. I was passing by the water machine yesterday and did you see Carl's attitude towards Bryce Man, he is such an office douchebag. And the way he parades around like an alpha male and smiles."
Sean - "Yeah, man. He even smells like one too."
Jim - "What would an office douchebag smell like?"
Sean - "Like spicy musk, something like that."
Jim - "Ah, I get you."
Sean - "Yeah, man. He even smells like one too."
Jim - "What would an office douchebag smell like?"
Sean - "Like spicy musk, something like that."
Jim - "Ah, I get you."
by AJollyGoodJester May 15, 2016
An aging trumpet player who resides in a college town.
He rides a scooter and claims to be proficient skydiver, when in fact he is merely afraid of planes and is a professional at fleeing extreme circumstances.
A wannabe hipster who pokes fun at everyone he encounters, spewing pretentious fluff about his supremacy over the rest of Earth's population.
Also owns a cat.
He rides a scooter and claims to be proficient skydiver, when in fact he is merely afraid of planes and is a professional at fleeing extreme circumstances.
A wannabe hipster who pokes fun at everyone he encounters, spewing pretentious fluff about his supremacy over the rest of Earth's population.
Also owns a cat.
Unsuspecting Victim - "Hey guys I just got my first skydiving license, woohoo!"
Douchebag - "You're a laughable buffoon. I've had my license since before Charles Darwin took a sample of King Arthur's hair and claimed he was a direct descendant of Cleopatra. My cat is more deserving of a license than you, you hopeless amateur."
Douchebag - "You're a laughable buffoon. I've had my license since before Charles Darwin took a sample of King Arthur's hair and claimed he was a direct descendant of Cleopatra. My cat is more deserving of a license than you, you hopeless amateur."
by ArianaBOOYAH January 14, 2010
That DJ you've added to Facebook that sends constant invites to crappy events. He always has the place bumping, usually with 5 people in attendance and considers anyone that praises his work as his best friend. A real douchebag. Tells everyone how much he gets laid when he in fact has a girlfriend of 7 years at home that he has a mortgage with. Also has a meme based off of him: memegenerator.net/dj-douchebag
DJDB: "man I had that party BUMPIN' tonight!"
Me: "There were only 4 people there"
DJDB: "EVERYONE LOVES ME"
Me: "Your a douchebag, DJ, and DJ Douchebag"
Me: "There were only 4 people there"
DJDB: "EVERYONE LOVES ME"
Me: "Your a douchebag, DJ, and DJ Douchebag"
by FLATLAND FUNKY SMELLING MUSIC November 08, 2011
Canadian: Dude, these guys on Jersey Shores are real chotch bags, eh?
American: Uh, what?
Canadian: Oh, sorry, I mean, Metric douchebags, eh.
American: Uh, what?
Canadian: Oh, sorry, I mean, Metric douchebags, eh.
by Metric Douche November 19, 2010