Corporate dozen

A six-pack marketed as a case. Corporate advertising that cynically misleads buyers into thinking they are getting more than they receive.

Contrary to the baker's dozen of 13 to encourage long-term loyalty, the corporate dozen provides less than that advertised for short-term gain. or: The baker's dozen is what we were, and the corporate dozen is what we have become.

by DrTortoise August 15, 2024

corporate slop

bland, soulless, minimalistic, modern-day web design that prioritizes profit instead of creating user accessibility

the old web used to be so fun with all the colorful designs and flash games, now it is just all corporate slop.

by GamingIzzy April 3, 2025

World Habitants' Authority and Trust Corporation (WHAT Corp.)

A fictitious secret government organization that controls: media, politics, economy, healthcare, and more in the Carlos Lerma universe.

The World Habitants' Authority and Trust Corporation (WHAT Corp.) took Logan Wright in to bargain silence after he found the cure for cancer.

by swtffdua April 6, 2023

corporate rape

This is when a corporation screws you over really badly and your only option is litigation. The cost of legal representation for litigation is tens of thousands of dollars. Therefore, it is almost impossible to find an attorney to represent you if your damages are less than tens of thousands of dollars. Corporations simply use general liability insurance if they are sued. There is no equivalent if you are the plaintiff, which is a very annoying constitutional violation.

I am a victim of corporate rape from xyz corporation, who screwed me over so badly and they spend so much money on attorneys, however, I cannot afford legal representation.

by Pewpewpewrainbows April 19, 2023

Corporate Dirtbag

A 9-5 office employee that’s a heavy weed smoker and can still deliver their projects on time. They can go out on the weekdays and will function pretty well at work the next day.
They’ll do shit like work from home but really they’re just checking outlook and teams while on the road somewhere. Or they might be gaming and occasionally asking their boss a random question. Pretty fun person to work with though.

I’m not sure why I tried so hard in college. The people that didn’t try as hard ended up in the same place as I am. It’s my turn to chill. I’m in my corporate dirtbag era.

by portapattie May 9, 2023

Corporate Circle Jerk

(1) When a company makes a change to its structure, platform, or logo to bandwagon political correctness. This is to virtue signal and/or make good their past misdeeds, but realistically it was all for raising revenue through marketing.

While proclaiming their altruism and stroking their egos, the businessmen at the top stroke something else at a corporate circle jerk knowing fully well that dollar bills are about to rain down on them.

Person 1:

Did you know it's June already?

Person 2:
When did you find out?

Person 1:
All the major brands changed their logos.

Person 2:
*sighs* The corporate circle jerk is upon us.

by Baron von Beuge August 20, 2023

Corporate Tortograph Theory

Corporate Tortograph Theory states that in the world of late-stage capitalism, the human impulse for creativity has been channeled so exclusively towards marketing that almost any absurd collection of words, names, or syllables is likely to coenside with a real-world entity, person, or organization of some sort, often in the corporate sphere.

“Jesse, I typed “Gortco” into Google and came up with a page for a random Norwegian company… just another proof for Corporate Tortograph Theory.”

by Galaxy94 June 30, 2023