The largest douche bag on the planet. Has both mommy and daddy issues. Fails to comprehend even the most simplistic sentences and ideas. When he speaks everyone who hears it is instantly made dumber. He fails in school, in life, and in every other way possible. He is more unattractive than a $20 dollar a night motel bathroom. He thinks that the world is flat and that science is something you drink. His clothing choices have all the charm of a Klan rally. Jared likes his mom... a little too much. Jared is descended from a long line of complete morons, and he lives up to the standard his ancestors set.
by JimBobCooter1969 February 06, 2019
by skjssnne February 05, 2020
by jaredfriesen December 17, 2019
jared is a homosexual boy who goes to tim hortons too much and likes to fuck thots in the comfort of his basement to prove he is not in fact gay. He is also a member of the thot patrol and is a major ladies man, which is how he's successful in luring thots into his dungeon. he also plays minecraft lol loser.
by hyfrsfjhjitrsctvbghnjml May 24, 2019
Having the name Jared is basically having reached the end you are the best you have achieved everything if your name is Jared by the time you have completed life you will have made boris Johnson shut the fuck up you would have made infinate funny season of modern family you have in vented the infinate money machine you have defeated all these 9 year old internet clown who have supported jake Paul and Bryce hall and most importantly you have taken everyones girl on earth
by Best defffonitions July 31, 2021
His jawlines, shoulders, and muscles are the best! You have to think about what he looks like nude, you might not be gay though. ;)
"I've seen his jawline, shoulders, and muscles push against his fashion sense. I've thought about what he looks like nude, I'm not gay though. >:("
"Yeah! Jared's jawlines, shoulders, muscles are the greatest!"
"Yeah! Jared's jawlines, shoulders, muscles are the greatest!"
by Storyswap Chara August 22, 2021