cock your trumpet

British
To take ages on the toilet, usually taking a really long shit.

"After that long walk I'm gonna go cock my trumpet."

"Oh you're going in? Are you gonna cock your trumpet?"
"Hahaha yeah gonna be ages"
"Ok don't be too long"

by dkamais498 July 4, 2020

Chilly Trumpet

The act of accidentally touching the moist freezing rim of the toilet with the end of your cock whilst you sit on the shitter contemplating life and snapchatting your nearest and dearest.

It is by the most uncomfortable experience a man can endure.

"Man, I just experienced a chilly trumpet whilst snapping Jessica about what happened in Oceana last night"

"Oh dear how unpleasant!"

by Jonathon Pembersley April 23, 2015

Texas trumpet

The act of fingering anothers anus while cupping the balls with the same hand, whole concurrently giving a blowjob.

Timmy took Tina home and she gave him a Texas trumpet.

by Bigdaddyblacksheep December 16, 2024

Trumpet Trunks

One who's backside is like a trumpet blowing in their pants

She is a real trumpet trunks, I hear her farting during Teams calls!

by Drinky McDrinkface August 19, 2022

Trumpet Sex

When you stick something can be smoked (Like Cigarettes, Blunts) up a girl’s vagina and suck out from their mouth, then sticking your penis up their vagina.

“Me and Katie had Trumpet Sex during summer vacation.”

by scalleywag January 2, 2024

slidey trumpet

Just a trombone

Guy: Hey, that's a nice slidey trumpet you got there

Trumbonist: It's a trombone.

Trumbonist in there mind: AAAAAAH!!

by DaRedShatter March 13, 2018

Trumpet

A trump supporter that doesnt actually know anything about politics but views Donald Trump as a mascot for their ignorance. They are very vocal about despising "fake liberal news" but will unquestionably believe any rumor or conspiracy that trump tweets. They can go on a 10 minute rant about hillary clinton eating babies for superpowers and with a straight face call you a sheep afterwards. Most view education as a "liberal hoax" and avoid it like the plague. They may or may not be associated with Qanon

Man, that trumpet over their is having a meltdown over having to wear a mask at a grocery store.

by HillaryEatsBabies November 6, 2020