I wish I was Jared, 19

This phrase can be seen in the comment section of outrageous or otherwise shocking posts to express disturbance, confusion, or surprise. It refers to the popular vine “My name is Jared, I’m 19, and I never learned how to fucking read”

*A tweet vividly describing someones sexual fantasy involving feet, motor oil, 13 male strippers, toothpaste, used toilet paper, and a bidet*

Comment section:
“Man, I wish I was Jared, 19”

by Seen_too_much June 07, 2024

<.7.9.7.6.>Productivity, I Wish To Die To Even <&>AnUdA<&>Odd Numbers<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>Productivity, I Wish To Die To Even <&>AnUdA<&>Odd Numbers<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>Productivity, I Wish To Die To Even <&>AnUdA<&>Odd Numbers<.7.9.7.6.>

by AnudaJaniceRobles June 02, 2025

Billie i wish

Expression to discribe how much you wish to be Billie Eilish.

My friend: Check my new hairstyle, green roots juste like Billie Eilish!
Me: Billie i wish.

by founes November 16, 2023

I wish “x” was real

When people say that they wish “x” was real, what they mean is that they live in another parallel dimension where “x” is a worldwide conspiracy theory. Looking at our universe, they wish that they had the same thing.

person -23: Man, I wish fr*nch people were real
person 197.6: why would you wish that?!
person “x” where (-x^2-3x+5)/6x=0: I wish cats were real
I wish “x” was real

by Just another writer tater November 05, 2023

I wish a bitch would Wednesday

You wish a female would try you on a Wednesday afternoon.

Tommy: that girl talkin Hot shit on yo name , she said she can take that nigha right up off you

😹Keisha: that Ho ain finna take shi, today ain the day, oml today is national I wish a bitch would Wednesday !! 👎🏽

by Com’n.getcho.nigha.back September 17, 2023

I wish I knew you wanted me, Monse

Blud, srsly? The girl I like wanted me? I jst hit a bru moment cuz........................................srsly tho?

I wish I knew you wanted me, Monse - This is a word that should be used when the girl you liked named Monse (From my previous post) wanted you. And you didn't know until her friend told you when she switched schools

by Call Me (626) -665 - 3202 September 16, 2024

<.7.9.7.6.>I Wish I Can Communicate With Individuals They Way They Communicate With Other Individuals<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>I Wish I Can Communicate With Individuals They Way They Communicate With Other Individuals<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>I Wish I Can Communicate With Individuals They Way They Communicate With Other Individuals<.7.9.7.6.>

by IPromiseToDoWhatIPromised May 28, 2025