A tree trimming service from Chazy NY who hires felons - preferably registered sex offenders - to trim your bushes and peep in your windows.
Felon's Tree Removal does a great job as long as you don't mind rapists and murders peeping in your windows and casing the joint.
by Read it! July 14, 2025
Get the Felon's Tree Removalmug. A colloquial term for an arborist from upstate NY or other back woods place who employs felons, particularly, registered sex offenders.
He first verifies that they are indeed registered sex offenders - or at a minimum convicted felon - and then he gives them unsupervised access to chainsaws and wood chippers. Sometimes accidents happen and there end up fewer felons than they started with, so it's not all bad.
Other times - well, felons with chainsaw... The possibilities are endless, and some aren't so great.
He first verifies that they are indeed registered sex offenders - or at a minimum convicted felon - and then he gives them unsupervised access to chainsaws and wood chippers. Sometimes accidents happen and there end up fewer felons than they started with, so it's not all bad.
Other times - well, felons with chainsaw... The possibilities are endless, and some aren't so great.
Bro "Brah, where can I get a job? I just I'm on parole, so nobody's gonna hire me."
Brah "Bro, go work for Felon's Tree Removal. They'll hire ya. They literally only hire felons."
Bro "Nah, Bra, they won't let me do anything. I'm a felon."
Bra "The hell they won't! You'll get your own chainsaw, wood chipper, shit, you'll probably get your own shotgun to protect you from choopacobras and parole officers."
Brah "Bro, go work for Felon's Tree Removal. They'll hire ya. They literally only hire felons."
Bro "Nah, Bra, they won't let me do anything. I'm a felon."
Bra "The hell they won't! You'll get your own chainsaw, wood chipper, shit, you'll probably get your own shotgun to protect you from choopacobras and parole officers."
by Double take July 10, 2025
Get the Felon's Tree Removalmug. often a black person who blends in with the night because of their extreme melanin so they become a melanin felon.
by melon felonater. September 7, 2025
Get the melanin felonmug. National Felon day is Sept. 30th
by H34D G4N6 September 30, 2023
Get the Felon Daymug. An arborist company that hires felons to come to your house and trim your bushes. They charge extra to cut trees but will trim your bush for free.
Becky "I was going to hire Felons Tree Removal to trim the trees at my house. You think they're any good?"
Lateesha "Bitch, I don need no felons trimin' my bush!"
Lateesha "Bitch, I don need no felons trimin' my bush!"
by SuperWordNerd July 10, 2025
Get the Felons Tree Removalmug. When a person acts out of their character to impress others and appear bad ass or have bad ass like qualities, Hence the meaning of the fruit a watermelon referring to guys who act as if they are the hulk, a one man army, or unstoppable.
I.E (In explanation)
A watermelon being green on the outside (a foolish rookie, in-experienced,fake,attention seeking) and but not hardened or tough and soft&pink inside..like a vagina.
Fake tough guy AKA soon to be prison bitch.
I.E (In explanation)
A watermelon being green on the outside (a foolish rookie, in-experienced,fake,attention seeking) and but not hardened or tough and soft&pink inside..like a vagina.
Fake tough guy AKA soon to be prison bitch.
Joey is a fuckin watermelon felon...dude tries to play so bad ass but isn't impressing anyone..i bet if he goes to prison he would get turned into a prag ASAP.
Dude chill the hell out, they can see how green you are you're not a badass i won't continue to hang out with you if you keep up the act when they expose you for how pink you are i don't want to be affiliated with the likes of you.
Dude chill the hell out, they can see how green you are you're not a badass i won't continue to hang out with you if you keep up the act when they expose you for how pink you are i don't want to be affiliated with the likes of you.
by Azuroh June 2, 2013
Get the Watermelon felonmug. by n4zhg January 4, 2019
Get the federal felon shufflemug.