Usually known by the acronym SIF, a secret internet fatty posts photographs of themselves on social networking sites that are purposely shot so as to disguise their obesity. Classic examples usually include a combination of:
- close-up head or face shots
- extremely high or overhead camera angles
- low-key lighting and possibly actual image manipulation.
Women often show cleavage, or employ boobnosis, as a secondary deception.
Since most men have booblevision to begin with, they rarely pause to consider that the SIF in question could shrink one to three WHOLE bra cup sizes if they ever lost the excess fat. Obviously going from a D cup to an A cup would render the formerly outstanding bust line moot.
(In this same vein, a woman writer once quipped, "When I'm a size six, I can get into my favorite jeans. When I'm a size fourteen, I finally have the bust line that I always wanted in high school.") 'Nuff said?
Secret internet fatties come in two basic groups: those who want to lose weight, and those who won't do what is necessary to lose weight (choosing instead to refer to themselves by outrageous euphemisms such as: "fluffy", "juicy", "big boned", "pleasingly plump", or "BBW". Star Jones is their poster child).
To the first group, I would suggest having your thyroid gland checked out by a medical doctor who knows something about nutrition and does not dismiss naturopathic remedies. Eat enough medium to low calorie foods to feel full, and have a few colonics to insure proper nutrient absorption. If you have been genetically hosed by your family's DNA, you're going to have to put extra effort into whatever you do. Surgery may be an option, but there is NO substitute for regular exercise.
To the second group I ask, who do you think you are fooling? As Jeff Foxworthy observed about large women wearing Spandex, "If your bottom looks like two raccoons wrestling around in a fifty pound sack of feed, you are NOT 'juicy'!"
- close-up head or face shots
- extremely high or overhead camera angles
- low-key lighting and possibly actual image manipulation.
Women often show cleavage, or employ boobnosis, as a secondary deception.
Since most men have booblevision to begin with, they rarely pause to consider that the SIF in question could shrink one to three WHOLE bra cup sizes if they ever lost the excess fat. Obviously going from a D cup to an A cup would render the formerly outstanding bust line moot.
(In this same vein, a woman writer once quipped, "When I'm a size six, I can get into my favorite jeans. When I'm a size fourteen, I finally have the bust line that I always wanted in high school.") 'Nuff said?
Secret internet fatties come in two basic groups: those who want to lose weight, and those who won't do what is necessary to lose weight (choosing instead to refer to themselves by outrageous euphemisms such as: "fluffy", "juicy", "big boned", "pleasingly plump", or "BBW". Star Jones is their poster child).
To the first group, I would suggest having your thyroid gland checked out by a medical doctor who knows something about nutrition and does not dismiss naturopathic remedies. Eat enough medium to low calorie foods to feel full, and have a few colonics to insure proper nutrient absorption. If you have been genetically hosed by your family's DNA, you're going to have to put extra effort into whatever you do. Surgery may be an option, but there is NO substitute for regular exercise.
To the second group I ask, who do you think you are fooling? As Jeff Foxworthy observed about large women wearing Spandex, "If your bottom looks like two raccoons wrestling around in a fifty pound sack of feed, you are NOT 'juicy'!"
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SexyLexie is a self-proclaimed "MySpace hottie" but Kip Dynamite wants a full body shot to prove she's not just another secret internet fatty with delusions of grandeur.
SexyLexie is a self-proclaimed "MySpace hottie" but Kip Dynamite wants a full body shot to prove she's not just another secret internet fatty with delusions of grandeur.
by One Stark Reality September 19, 2009
Get the Secret Internet Fatty mug.When you rip ass into your homies mouth, then proceeding to make out with the boys to transfer the stench.
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As much a state of mind as an action: unambiguously displaying confidence, intelligence, wealth, style and class while maintaining a positive, lackadaisical, attitude. One who truly fratts hard never forgets the value of having a good time or the responsibilities to which he is obligated.
Fratting includes but is not limited to, golfing, drinking, deep sea fishing, boating, sitting in the sun while at a pool or beach and finally denouncing guidos by any and every means necessary.
by RedButtons December 25, 2009
Get the Fratting mug.A person to takes frattiness to the next level. Usually associated with a "go big or go home" mentality with alcohol, either not drinking (1% of the time) or taking 10 shots (99% of the time). This individual really likes to have a good time and willing to do anything to have one, no matter how shocking or embarrassing the acts are. He usually is an confident guy who doesn't care about his image, but his excessive frattiness image tends to help him look cool in front of girls anyways. He is well-liked and is welcomed at all bars and parties.
"He wore no pants to the prep school party? Lord what a fratyang he is."
"The open bar started 5 minutes ago and he is already ten drinks deep. The bar owner must hope there aren't any more fratyangs here."
"Look at all his facebook pictures. He looks gradually more retarded in each picture. FRATYANG!"
"The open bar started 5 minutes ago and he is already ten drinks deep. The bar owner must hope there aren't any more fratyangs here."
"Look at all his facebook pictures. He looks gradually more retarded in each picture. FRATYANG!"
by NorthwesternWildcat October 24, 2009
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Get the Fatty Dubs mug.An explanation you give to your buddies when you have a real growler in your guts and you're about to give birth to a huge deuce, dump, toilet trout, pinch a loaf, etc.
by XXL Petey May 3, 2014
Get the drop a fatty mug.A large balloon filled with nitrous oxide often sold in concert parking lots or festivals.
A whippet.
A whippet.
by Psychedelic Andy June 2, 2009
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