Johnson

Sargeant Major A. J. Johnson is even more badass than the Master Chief. He is the very meaning of badass.
" 'Johnson. As long as this lasts?' Jilan (his commanding officer) grabbed his hand and wrapped it around her chest. 'At ease.' " -Contact Harvest
"I would have been your daddy, but the dog beat me over the fence." - Sergeant Johnson
by WhatsInAName??? June 07, 2010
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johnson

Someone who sucks the sperm out of the penis and blows it back into the male's rectum.
I don't know what happened last night but i think i pulled a johnson.

Man, my breath stinks. Do you think giving that johnson caused it?
by Matt Saus March 06, 2007
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Johnson

A word that describes absolutely anything
"That johnson over there looks like a good place to eat"
(In reference to a park bench) "we can take seat on that johnson right there"
by Odulya Like Semin April 14, 2015
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johnson

a word to describe a little penis
-Why do they call him Mr. Johnson?

-Because he has a small penis apparently.
by Ashlilly August 23, 2009
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The well-known and liberally discussed philisophical debate on whether or not it would be worth one billion dollars to suck on Magic Johnson's HIV infected cock until completion on live television.

It is generally acknowledged that, of the two camps, those of the opinion that it is worth the one billion dollars are not affected by further augmentations to the wager for the sake of humiliation (for example, ass to mouth, or ass to goat to mouth, or ass to goat to contestant's mom, to mouth, etc...)
Alex said he'd take the Magic Johnson's Johnson Gambit, cure aids, execute anyone who's ever seen the video, and cackle with maniacal cachinations as he fucked Natalie Portman nightly in his custom sex dungeon, the likes of which Gary Gygax has never seen.

Still, everyone would.. know...
by Scottee Mac November 23, 2010
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Johnson

Dude I just johnsoned.

I johnson and drive all the time.

He just out-johnsoned me!

She johnsons like a maniac and drinks like a psycho.
by AdamShitz May 13, 2011
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Johnson

His Johnson was hanging out
The baby showed everyone his johnsom
by Crazydude108 August 22, 2015
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